Forever young.

acoustic night part 3 @ munkee studio

2011-12-21T12:07:00.003+08:00

Acoustic Night Part III @ Munkee Studio was awesome! It was 3 days ago, and I know I'm a little late on updating, but so many things have been happening. It was LTT's first performance together, and I'm so happy with it. I'm pretty sure we weren't the best, and I certainly hope we weren't the worst, but I had fun even though I was nervous as hell.

We sang the following songs:

With Ur Love - Cher Lloyd
Fight For This Love - Cheryl Cole
What Makes You Beautiful - One Direction

Notice how they're all UK artists? :p

Photos below were taken by Aiai.

There are videos, but they are currently in Cass's camera, along with the rest of the pictures, which hopefully shall be uploaded by the end of this week.

On another note, we just discovered a few days ago that our Less Than Three Facebook page has been hacked into, and none of us (Nabilah, Fiza, Nini or myself) are the admins of the page. It's really frustrating for us, but we finally got a new Facebook page back in order!

http://www.facebook.com/ltt.official
Please click the above link and like our new Facebook page!

Who remembered our first mashup cover titled "How To Love You Like A Love Song"? Well, it's on YouTube now, like finally, and here is the video.

More videos and pictures will be up soon, insya'allah! ♥

with your love.

2011-12-14T03:47:00.003+08:00

It's weird, isn't it? When someone makes one mistake, suddenly every good deed they have ever done becomes forgotten. It's like people expect this certain someone to be perfect, to never make mistakes. Everyone says "nobody's perfect, everyone makes mistake", but who really agrees to that term?

Yes, my boyfriend has made me cry on several occasions, but is that reason enough to label him as a bad boyfriend? What is a relationship without arguments? I say that an argument is just a step to getting to know each other better, it just depends on whether you want it to affect your relationship or not. My parents have been married for over 20 years, and they have gotten into arguments countless of times, but they're still going strong, aren't they? Are you going to label my father as a bad man over the one argument he has with my mother, or are you going to label him as a great guy for the 20 over years he has spent taking care of her welfare? You tell me.

When I got a relapse and had to get my medication injected into me, my boyfriend took me to see the nephrologist at 9 am in the morning. When my dad was too busy, my boyfriend took me to the hospital to collect my medication. My boyfriend picked me and my mum up from the hospital when my dad had to go for a meeting. My boyfriend made a video of him singing and dedicated it to me. He took me to Bukit Tinggi where he asked me to become his girlfriend on top of a tower. When I got stomach flu, my boyfriend stayed at my place for the whole day trying to feed me, and he kept an eye on me even when I was asleep on the sofa. When I got a fever, he showed up downstairs. My boyfriend has bought pizza for my whole family a few times. He brought me to Mont Kiara in the morning where he cooked breakfast for me. My boyfriend is in really good terms with my family, and is even doing business together with my dad. My boyfriend bought souvenirs for the whole family when he went on holiday. He even drove my dad to Giant and afterwards went to get some coffee together. My boyfriend shared money with me and my aunt to buy a birthday cake for my dad. My boyfriend reminds me every day that he loves me.

And those are just some of the things my boyfriend has done. Do you still dare say he is a bad boyfriend only because of the few times he has made me cry? Yes, I do cry. It is only human to cry. Insecurities and paranoia tends to cause fights. But that doesn't mean he is treating me badly, because honestly, I can't find anyone else who can treat me better. I am perfectly happy with the man I am with now, I would really appreciate it if people would realize that. Remind me to stay strong when I am upset, not tell me that he is an awful person.

No one ever promised that relationships would be easy, no one ever said that it'll be a breeze. And I am prepared to face all that with Nazrin. I wouldn't have it any other way.

I love you ♥

where is this going?

2011-12-10T01:24:00.005+08:00

Yesterday I went to Nini's place together with Bella and Fiza for another practice session for this Dec 18's acoustic night at Munkee Studio. I feel like it had been a really productive day for we managed to finalize our song choices and the order to sing them in. It was so fun singing at the porch, we all couldn't stop smiling at each other. All that's left is to just make it perfect ♥ I seriously cannot wait for acoustic night now!

After Bella and Fiza left, I stayed with Nini for a while longer. We were picking out outfits to wear and had heart-to-heart conversations with each other. It was so fun spending time with her, even though we didn't do much except for staying in her room.

Just look at us! Who else will be willing to take such ugly photos like that with me? ♥ *except for my boyfriend of course, hahaha

By the way, Less Than Three is now on YouTube! It's a new channel, and nothing has been edited in yet, but we have uploaded our cover of "What Makes You Beautiful" in it.

Help us spread the love! ♥ Bella, Fiza and Nini are coming over to my place later on to practice again, I can't wait to meet my girls :)

That's the gist of what had happened yesterday, and so now let me get to the point of what I want to talk about.

Long-distance relationships.

I have been in one before, and frankly that didn't work out too well even though the first few months were good. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I don't think it can't work out. I highly believe that if two people are deeply in love with each other, things will fall into place somehow. Right now I just want to talk about how you should actually behave in these relationships.

Well, I am no love guru, and of course these aren't rules you should abide by. But being a girl that has been through this kind of relationship before, I think it's only natural for me to want to share what we females want in an LDR. Not all girls though, maybe this just goes for me and some others, but hey, you can always take it as tips.

We don't ask for much, really. It's an LDR, what can you ask for? We don't expect you to book a ticket for the next flight, fly to our country and show up at our door with a bouquet of flowers. We don't expect your attention 24/7 because we are aware that you have other things to do, because so do we. We don't expect you to call our cellphones and talk to us for hours, because we know how expensive it can be. We don't expect you to stay online for hours just to talk to us, because we know you get tired.

All we ask for is reassurance. No matter how "busy" you get, it really helps if you could contact us at least once a day. It would make us feel so much better knowing that we actually cross your mind. Besides, these days you have Twitter, Facebook, WhatsApp, BBM, Viber, Line and so many other free applications. Just send a simple and sweet message, and that's all. We just want to hear from you. We want to know you're fine, and that you care about the relationship as much as we do. We're far away from each other, is it that hard to let us know how you are? Trust is really important in these relationships. And of course you'd want us to trust you. But how can we trust you when you don't even want to talk to us?

I'm not saying that guys are always the ones that do wrong in an LDR, sometimes the girls mess up too. But I'm just speaking from a female's point of view.

To whoever is experiencing an LDR right now, I really wish you guys the best of luck, and stay strong! May the flames of your love keep burning forever ♥

P.S. This has absolutely nothing to do with my boyfriend. Yes, he is in Australia right now, but he texts and calls me every day, and he reminds me every morning when he wakes up and every night before he goes to bed that he loves me. I seriously cannot ask for anything better. I love you Ameer Nazrin Moore :*

And to my best friend, please stay strong! I know you are hurting right now, but always know that there are people here that care for you, and do appreciate having you around. I guarantee that if this doesn't work out, you will find someone that's a thousand times better in the future. I know that is easy to say, but I'm sure Allah isn't mean to let you suffer. Do not waste your tears and effort on someone who doesn't know what he wants. I love you bestie :)

"Anything that's worth having is sure enough worth fighting for."

take a chance on me.

2011-12-09T00:22:00.005+08:00

I met up with my girls yesterday to have lunch at An-Nurs, D'Pangkin. It was good meeting all of them after SPM ended, it feels like such a long time since we properly hung out together. And as expected, when we all get together, there'll be loads of gossip, laughter and stories. We then went to Yaya's house where Nazhif was already waiting for us, and we all did some karaoke. We also went on Omegle and met some pretty friendly people. Surprisingly, all these friendly people were Indonesians. We didn't really open our mouths to talk to them, except for Nini of course, who happens to be really good talking in Indonesian. Spent hours on YouTube watching random videos. I can tell that we all had nothing better to do because we started off by watching music videos, and in around 4 hours, ended up watching Japanese prank videos. Although we didn't really do much, I had a great day with my girls. Love you guys long time!

Nini, Yaya, Elora, Dolly, Teeha, Nazhif ♥

I have been so in love with this song and video lately. Not only because this video has 4 really good-looking men in it, or neither is it because Aston is so darn handsome, or the fact that I am head over heels in love with his voice... But also because this song has a certain meaning to it that makes me smile.

You're so scared to fall in love
'Cause you end up in the dust
Everytime, everytime
Now you see us all the same
Like our words are just a game
Spitting lies, dirty lies

I know you know
There's something here
But you cannot get past the fear
I can help you make it clear.

So when you feel like trying again
Reach out, take my hand
See how great it could be
To fall in love with someone you can trust
Who would never give up
'Cause you're all that he needs

You give 100 percent but you've never seen a cent
They're so blind, they're so blind
'Cause I'm looking at your face
And the world's a better place
In your eyes, lovely eyes

You got nothing to lose baby,
But you won't know if you don't try
Please don't leave me asking why
So when you're ready to choose baby
I'll be here with open arms
With the same in love in my heart

If you read the lyrics above, it's basically something a lot of girls have felt at least once in their life. Not only girls, even guys too. I have felt this way. Feeling like my heart and feelings have been played with, feeling like I'm not appreciated, feeling like everything I do goes unnoticed, having to wait too long for someone you like. Those feelings will eventually build up to feeling insecure about oneself and the inability to trust again. Afraid to trust because you don't want the same thing to repeat itself.

We're teenagers, we go through multiple heartbreaks. It's all a part of life. But I truly believe that everyone in this world was made for someone, so why give up on love at such a young age when the future is clearly bright? Always keep a positive thought, it doesn't kill to be happy. There will come a time in your life where someone will walk into it, and make you change your mind about every negative thing that exists around you. We have to be hopeful that not every person is the same, and there is someone out there who will want to make you happy.

Even though it's just a song, it has rekindled my faith that there are some genuine guys out there. Guys who would do anything to prove to that one girl that not every boy is the same, and that this time he will take care of her heart.

Based on personal experience, my heart has been cut and bruised several times over. I was crushed. When I thought things were getting better, my kindness and tolerance got taken advantage of. Then I fell for someone who had never done me wrong. It was perfect, but before anything could happen, someone else swept me off my feet. And that person belonged to someone else, and he didn't know what he wanted. Everything went wrong everywhere. But beneath all that chaos, I always found solace in talking to a certain someone. When I wasn't looking, when I wasn't hoping, that certain someone just rose above the rest and saved me from that mess. He saved me from myself.

Back when I liked someone else's boyfriend, that was a pretty horrible moment in my life. How could I have done that to a friend? Not only that, but back when I liked him, I was willing to bring myself down, to settle for so much less than I actually deserved. I was constantly hurting at his confusion. But now that I'm with my boyfriend, he made me realize that I don't need to change for anyone. For once, I am comfortable in my own skin and I am not afraid to be myself. Those love stories you see in movies that you think can never come true? They are real. In fact, I'm living in it right now. It's no perfect fairytale, but I'm perfectly happy. And I really pray to God that he will be the man I'm going to marry. I don't think I've ever been this more sure in my life. I am in love, and is he :)

So guys and girls, don't ever give up on love. For every bad experience thrown your way, take it as a lesson. You don't have to change for anyone, because one day, someone who can accept you just the way you are will enter your life, and they will love you for you. Don't hurt yourself for people who are not worth it. And definitely do not let those who have hurt you blind you from the beauty of love.

Thank you for keeping my faith in love.

I love you, Ameer Nazrin Moore ♥

"See how great it could be to fall in love with someone you can trust,

who would never give up 'cause you're all that he needs."

i put it in a song.

2011-12-07T22:04:00.000+08:00

After our exams yesterday, Nini, Bella and Fiza came over to my place to make a video cover for our group "Less Than Three". We've always wanted to make a proper video, but have all come to an agreement where we would only concentrate on our group when SPM ends. So now that SPM is over, we're going to try make as many videos as we can.

We had loads of fun rehearsing the song and making the video. Not forgetting that while we were trying to find the right spot to shoot it, my cats came in with a huge lizard in their mouths which made us scream, to a point where Nini jumped onto a chair. It was hilarious! I wish I caught it on camera. The video ended up being just okay. There are still so many things about it that we didn't really like, and we know we can do better. Criticism is very much appreciated, we'd love to use your opinions as future reference to be better :) I know the video is not perfect, but I hope you guys enjoy it anyway! ♥ This is our cover of "What Makes You Beautiful" by One Direction.

That night, Nini slept over at my place. It has been ages since our last sleepover, and I swear last night was really fun. I would write down everything that happened, but there is literally too much to tell! To sum it all up, the night consisted of lizards, cockroaches, me running out of the kitchen with a knife, dropping a scale, squeezing juices out of fruits, singing and who could forget, pillow talks ♥

Squeezing juices out of fruits would be me attempting to make a homemade "hair highlighter". In the evening, I had asked my mum to go to a grocery store to get some lemons, lime and oranges. If you're curious as to what it really is, watch this video, it'll help.

So today, Nini and I sprayed that onto our hair and walked under the scorching sun for around 30 minutes. It's only been a day since we tried it, but I really hope it works! It's gonna save me loads of money, ugh. Bella came to my house that afternoon so that we could practice some songs for acoustic night (which shall be explained later).

Oh! And I also finally got my haircut! I've been pondering about this for a long time, but somehow yes, I have decided to cut it short. When people have problems, some of them cut themselves, but for me, I cut... my hair. I find that getting a new hairstyle is a good way of relieving stress. The hair that got cut away are like your problems. And once you're done, you leave those problems on the floor and forget about them. But hey, that's just me, haha! I've had a lot of things going through my mind lately, so this was exactly the change I needed.

In my honest opinion... I think I look like that mini Jessie J in her video clip, "Who's Laughing Now". I like my hair the way it is now, I feel more free. I can't wait for it to grow longer!

Less Than Three will be performing at Munkee Studio for acoustic night this Dec 18. I am stoked! I haven't been there in the longest time and I can't wait to meet everyone ♥

BH130A036

2011-12-06T17:16:00.000+08:00

So, it has been forever but I have finally decided to update my blog. These past few weeks I have been pretty busy (well not quite). Today is a special day because... SPM IS FINALLY OVER! The years we've spent waiting for this day to come... it's finally here. I can't believe how fast time flies.

I have such mixed emotions about this day. I feel sad, but at the same time, I'm so relieved. I've spent two years in a classroom with my classmates of 5 Lambda. They're the most hilarious bunch of people that I have ever met in my life. No matter how boring school gets, my classmates never fail to make me smile. I can honestly say that we're probably the noisiest bunch ever, and we can get on our teachers' nerves real easily. Personally, to me, I think we've bonded. I will miss the noisy atmosphere of 5 Lambda, I really will. I would list out names one by one, but there is literally too many.

Besides that, who can forget the wonderful teachers that have taught me? No matter how many times I complain about certain teachers, I cannot deny that I will in fact miss them to some extent. My teachers were adorable, hilarious, and so open. I couldn't have asked for a better group of teachers. Some of my teachers were more like friends to me, and those teachers are the ones that I will probably remember and thank until my dying day.

Even though I was born and raised in Singapore, most of what I am today was made in Malaysia. I love this country, I really do. And no matter how many times I have degraded the school, I will always love SMKBJ. I will miss all the teachers and friends that I made in, out, around or through school. I couldn't foresee myself loving this place as much as I do now. I've only been here for 4 years, but thank you guys for making me feel so at home ♥

Also, I am so glad/relieved/happy that the burden of having to study is gone. Even though not for very long, but long enough for me to rest my mind and get ready for a new part of my life. I'll just lay back and take a breather, there's no need to rush this time :)

There you go, some photos of my Lambda angels :) Now that that's over, all that's left is to wait for our SPM results. I wish all of you the best of luck, and let's hope that we get what we wanted! And from now on, I will try to update my blog more often. This has been dead for way too long, I kinda miss writing long blog posts.

i just want you to know,

2011-10-03T19:16:00.002+08:00

I've been sick, but I'll be fine :) The past few weeks have been really great, even though I have to go through them with a tense neck, flu, fever, cough and huge legs, ugh. I've been getting better, and that's good.

So let's start with one of the highlights of the past week. So as some of you may know, Heart-A-Tack won the Music Video Grant, and on 14 September 2011, they needed a crowd at their video shoot! And being a loyal friend (and fan) obviously I was going to be there! It was the first time I've been to Gudang Noisy in Ampang. And let me tell you, that place is hot, and everyone got sweaty. Thanks to this shooting, I went home with a really tense neck. I was tired, I was sweating, all my energy was drained. And to top it all off, I had an exam the next day. But it was all worth it :)

On the 28th September, the music video was premiered for the first time on TV. I am so proud of Heart-A-Tack! I love you guys so much Ayeen, Aiman, Putera, Kimi, Ezran, Najmi and Bong! ♥

And on 16th September, my darlings held a surprise birthday for me while my parents were in Johor. Although I may have expected it, I still love you guys so much for even bothering to try hold a surprise! You guys are simply the best :) Thanks to Rangga, Nini, Bella, Nazif, Tia, Kidd, Halv, Cik Mas, Acap, SOG, Corsets and Heart-A-Tack for being there ♥

So then I fell sick. It's a really long and complicated story, I don't really feel like talking about it. I'm just glad that Rangga and Nini were there for me when I was sick, and sorry Umi and Abah for troubling you with the back and forth trips to PPUM :( I love you guys ♥

Forgot to mention, baby got me a huuuuuge teddybear for my birthday! It's even wearing a Massacre By Fall shirt! Sayang awak sangat sangat ♥

On 23rd September, I followed Rangga to Sunway College, and after that to his Oma's house. I'm not going to lie, I was nervous as fuck. Mainly because I didn't know most of the people there, and also because it's my boyfriend's family. Fancy seeing Cikgu Liza there, and... Ustaz Basri, Cikgu Din, Cikgu Radziah and Cikgu Azman. Malu gila okay! After that we went to fetch Nini who was going to sleepover at my place, because my parents were going to Singapore the next day, leaving only me and Iskandar. So we took advantage of that time, and me and Iskandar went to 7-Eleven at 1 am++ because we were hungry bitches.

On 25th September, Massacre By Fall and SOG had a showcase at Senyap The Hub. And I of course had to be there because my boyfriend was performing :) Met Alia there, after such a long time, and she seemed pretty shocked that I showed up at a hardcore gig. I'm no huge metalcore fan, but my baby has all my support in whatever he does! Plus, he's hot when he's on stage, ha ha ha.

Oh, and another thing that's new for me is that I got prednisolone injected into me! It's not something to be happy about, but it's a first for me. Usually it's just taking pills, but they wanted a stronger and much faster cure, so they injected it straight into my bloodstream. Which meant going to the hospital 3 days in a row. Baby was there on the first day ♥ He treated me to some Secret Recipe, and then drove my mum and me back home :)

While I was at home, Bella and Nini did come over and we made a cover together! It was a mash-up of Lil Wayne and Selena Gomez's new single, How To Love and Love You Like A Love Song. And we changed it to How To Love You Like A Love Song because we're original like that haha!

And 2 days ago, I went out on a date with Rangga ♥ Thanks to him, I've been craving sushi for 2 whole days now, I am a hungry motherfucker, rawrrr! Can I just say that he is a truly wonderful human being, and that I am so blessed to have him in my life. I don't think I have ever found a love like this, and there is no one in the world I'd rather be with right now. I'm so glad I found someone I can be myself with, be comfortable around. And he still accepts me no matter what condition I'm in. Whether I'm sick or swollen, hair done or undone, with or without specs, messy or neat, I don't have anything to hide. This man takes me for who I am :)

Being in love with celebrities, that thing's fun for a while.
But not even Nathan Sykes can ever love me as much as Ameer Nazrin Moore does ♥

And trust me,

I love you.

1 + 1 = 2

2011-08-26T14:46:00.000+08:00

For every friend who has ever hurt you, there will always be that one person to tell you that everything is alright. The one person who will reassure you that you don't have to go through all the bad things in life alone, and will be your crying shoulder.

Aryni Jamaluddin
This is my best friend. She is gorgeous, isn't she? We may not have the longest friendship, we've been friends for around 3 years now. But I can safely say that we share a bond unlike many others. You can be friends with someone for over 10 years, yet still know nothing about them. But in the short time we've known each other, it feels like forever. She knows everything I am, everything I need, everything I do and she is basically everything someone needs in a friend. She's the one who puts a smile on my face during my darkest days, she was there when I had a relapse, and she makes me laugh like no other.

We may have our moments, but there is no argument that our strong friendship can't solve. She's clumsy, she's funny and definitely fun to be around. However, she is insecure, and sometimes she doesn't trust herself. She doesn't know that she is beautiful, and sometimes it hurts me to see that. If there's one thing I can wish for, it is to never lose her by my side. I honestly don't know what I'll do without her. It'll probably feel like I lost half of who I am.

And for every guy who mistreats you, takes advantage of you, and doesn't appreciate you, don't lose hope. Someone will eventually come along to prove to you that not all guys are the same. Someone who will actually put in effort to tell and show you that they love you.

Ameer Nazrin Moore
Everything was wrong before I met him. I was in a complete mess. I was confused, and I was the reason for a destroyed relationship. My heart has been ferociously toyed with, only to have him mend it. He loves me like no other. After all the boys that had done me wrong, I am thankful that God sent me a man worth my time and love. It only proves that there really is sunshine after rain.

He's really cheesy, filled with so much corny jokes and pick-up lines, but I love him that way. He's hilarious, patient, sweet, tender, loving and kind. He is indeed too much love to handle, and I only fear that I won't be able to love him the way he loves me. He gets along well with my family, with all my friends and the best part? He gets along really well with my best friend. He means what he says, and he goes the extra mile to prove that I mean something to him. I don't know what he sees in me, but I'm happy that he's with me, and I'm just so lucky.

I just felt like writing this today. I guess it finally just dawned upon me that I am blessed to have such people in my life. Just because I wrote about only 2 people, it doesn't mean that I don't care about the rest. I love all of you too, you know who you are :) Thank you Allah, for letting these people into my life ♥

collaborate and listen.

2011-08-03T22:04:00.003+08:00

Life is short, and there's only so many things that you can do while you're still breathing. Which is why I made this list, and I will try my very best to make everything in it come true while I still can. So, here are the things I want to do before I die:

Fire a gun
Bungee-jump, diving or skydiving
Touch a giraffe in Africa
Perform in front of a large crowd
Go on an impromptu runaway trip
Bathing in a waterfall
Sleep overnight waiting for a concert at the venue
Roadtrip with friends
Perform a song dedicated to my parents
Go to a My Chemical Romance concert
Meet Adam Lambert, Jessie J, Adele and the people that inspire me
Kiss a snake

There's actually still so much to do, I just need to think about. There will always be that one time in my day where I see something and I say "I will do this before I die."

On another note,

Ramadhan is here ♥

And I hope everyone has a nice time fasting :) Tons of things happened the past few weeks, and you can actually check it out on my Facebook. Photos are everywhere, so feel free to check it out.

PS: I ♥ 5 Lambda
I can't believe the year is coming to a hault soon. Good luck everyone!

By the way, everything I said about falling in love with the stars?
All down the drain. I'm back to square one.
Someone help me?

taking control.

2011-07-24T02:33:00.001+08:00

Sometimes we hurt people be it on purpose, or accidentally. We can never please everyone. What I've learnt the past few days is:

1. We can never choose who we fall for.

I guess everything develops as a crush. And a crush can either go away, or grow into something deeper. That person may not be the prettiest of the bunch, the creme de la crop, but you just happen to fall. He could be a fish with a hook in his mouth, but you're still holding on to see if you can get a chance.

2. Emotions are deadly.

No matter what you do, sometimes the way you feel can affect others. You can be out at a party, feeling moody and suddenly drag down the spirits' of your friends too. Or perhaps the way you feel towards someone can affect how another perceives him or her. Your feelings could break or make things.

3. Immature people hold unnecessary grudges.

Someone could have done every bad thing possible to you, and you'd still have the heart to forgive them. Yet, when you make a small mistake, that particular person can hate you to the guts. Some people are just so imbalanced, so biased and really immature. And that's something I have to live with.

4. Be nice to everyone, even if it means getting unappreciated.

After all your pathetic moves, heart-breaking moments with me, after all the food, shelter and not forgetting face I've given you, you still have the guts to hate me? Between the two of us, I should be pissed. After all that time you spent running away, after all the shit you have said behind my back, after taking advantage of my parents' hospitality, after trying to take advantage of ME, I should be the one that's pissed. But I still can find it in my to forgive you, so what have I possibly done to make you hate me so much? [/inner anger]

5. Tolerance.

I had a really deep talk with my dad the other day about this. I would explain a bit more on this topic, but unfortunately, I don't want to. Moral of the story is: Just be tolerant. With everything, everyone, everywhere.

6. Death is inevitable.

RIP Amy Winehouse

I'm sorry to so many people. This week has been a crazy rollercoaster ride for me. I'm sorry Ina, I'm sorry Bella, I'm sorry everyone. I just felt the need to say sorry. I guess sometimes, no matter what right I try to do, something will always turn out wrong. It makes me feel like I can't do anything right, but at the end of the day, there are always people to assure me that they'll never leave my side. And at the end, I still love you guys. My days have been made so much brighter, and it's all thanks to a group of people. You all know who you are, especially:

Nini, Kamal, Bella, Nazif, Yaya,

Heart-A-Tack

♥

Love you all to bits :)

falling in love with stars.

2011-05-21T02:26:00.000+08:00

Some people say it's ridiculous. Some say it's stupid. Many tell me to get back to reality. But I tell you, this is good. What I'm feeling is perfectly harmless, except for the occasional dirty jokes and fantasies. The giddy school-girl feeling of being in love with someone whilst you're only lingering in their shadows is surprisingly a better feeling than chasing down someone you actually know and is around you a lot.

I don't know about other people, but I've got my own reasons why I think being in love with celebrities is a wiser thing to do at this current age. Not specifically when you're 17, but during your teenage years. I'm not going to speak for the majority, I'm just going to give my own explanations for this. I'll only be lucky if any of you agree with what I'm about to say :)

1. "You'll never get them!"
Many people would actually say this. True, it does bring my spirit down a little when someone says it right up to my face, but don't you think I know that already? These celebrities, most of the time, don't even know I exist, and of course I know that the chances of me ever ending up with one is zilch. But you see, that's the thing. I'm supposedly in love with this person, but I'm already equipped with the knowledge that I can never get them, so I'm prepared. I ain't gonna brood over it. If they end up finding someone, then so be it. Isn't love about seeing the one you love happy? And I'm still gonna love'em, even if I have to love them from not more than 300 feet, lurking in the shadows.

2. No drama.
No matter how much you think being in love with celebrities is a bad idea, you can't deny the fact that there ain't gonna be any drama. Not unless you're the really obsessive "BACK OFF, BITCH!" type of fan. I go on Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr, and I see all these heartbreaking posts about how someone has cheated or a couple has broken up. And then there are fights over guys, girls. You know what I mean. The usual teenage love dramas and triangles you always see online. People are upset and depressed, and I'm here enjoying my life as a young girl.

A few weeks ago, a friend of mine liked someone, and apparently one of her girlfriends "stole" him away despite knowing how much she liked him. This caused a bit of a stir, and much confusion for the boy. I can safely say that they've settled this, though there might be a little grudge every now and then. And just recently, the boy I had a small crush on got into a relationship with a girl he's been trying to get for weeks. Imagine if I had driven a wedge in between him and her. And then I thought to myself, "Wow, I'm so glad I didn't get myself into deep shit." Saved my own skin because I'm in love with a celebrity.

3. Priorities set straight.
So now that I've got no drama, and I know thatI can never get the celebrity, what does that leave me with? A clear mind to think. Well that's me of course, I don't know about anyone else. Many people around me are too caught up in trying to win the heart of someone they like that they've completely pushed aside their priorities. But for me? Surprisingly, I still have room in my head to study and try to do my best in school. I have no one to win over, so that's one less burden for me. No one to win over = no more bitch fights = no jealousy = no drama. Another burden down.

Besides setting my priorities straight, there's also the endless inspiration these celebrities give me. I've seen a lot of people throw their dreams away when they're in a relationship, or at least stop working hard on it. Most of the time, they'll concentrate on their relationship and the person they're with. In my past relationships, I've never seen myself as anything more than just a housewife in the future, and all I could ever think of was being loves every day. But these celebrities, they inspire me. They inspire me to be better, they inspire me to achieve my dreams. They keep my spirit burning, thus the reason why I'm very enthusiastic about my future. I think about it every day and plan on how I'm going to get where I want to be. I don't want to be a washed-up has-been.

So there you have it. The reasons why I think being in love with celebrities at this moment is a much wiser choice for me. But then again, it's not like you can choose who you fall in love with. And of course, I'm not going to stay this way forever. Sooner or later, I will find someone and get married. Just not now, not during my teenage years. I need to live life, concentrate. Being in love with celebrities steers me away from unnecessary drama and jealousy, and I am proud.

And no, when I talk about this, I'm not trying to say that I know anything about love. I'm just too lazy to type out "strong attraction and feelings", so I'll just substitute that phrase with the word "love".

Don't judge me :)

life is nothing but a drama.

2011-04-19T22:50:00.003+08:00

I haven't done a blog post in a long while, so I've decided to take this time to update. Where do I even start?

The past few weeks has been filled with so much drama, and I'm glad that's over and done with. I hope we can all put that behind us and forget it ever happened. Let me just take this time to say that life sucks. People get hurt, and then you die. But that doesn't mean you should keep holding grudges. Life is beautiful, and perfect. And so are you. We are young, and free. Don't hate. Don't discriminate. I don't plan to feel this way anymore. I miss everything the way it was. Sure I get sick and tired of feeling it every few months, but what can replace this bond?

Which brings to light that today is Dolly's birthday! Happy birthday, my dear chica ♥ There's so much I can say about this girl. She's pretty on the outside, but she's a tough little soldier on the inside. A very loyal and protective friend too! And to celebrate her birthday today, she got egg-ed and flour-ed after school. A very pitiful sight indeed, but that didn't stop me from giving her a hug :') I loooove you!

Happy 17th birthday,
Ungku Alynn Dalila ♥

On a more fangirly note, The Wanted has started AND ended their Behind Bars Tour 2011 on April 15th!

Pretty gutted that I can't go to any of the dates. It's their first tour, and which fan wouldn't want to be there? Judging from all the videos of it online, the boys did a really awesome job. I don't mean to get sentimental, but looking at how far they have come since All Time Low seriously makes me tear. I am so proud of these boys, I don't even know where to start. Last year they did radio and school tours, but now they're having proper tours. I should probably stop, or else I'll go on forever about how happy these boys make me. The most famous of the songs they performed being a mash-up of Taio Cruz's song, of course.

Pretty fucking sexy if you ask me. There are so many funny moments during tour! Way too much, actually. But I just HAVE to mention the time they pranked Jay on stage at Edinburgh, their last venue for tour! Click on this link to hear Jay singing in a chipmunk voice! It's at around 1:57, so do check it out. You won't regret it :) I swear he sounds like a baby laughing, so adorable! Also, to commemorate their first ever tour, I made a poster. I've put one huge one in my room already, and sent another to the band. If you're wondering how it looks like, here is a photo.

It's been floating around the internet (same fate as my Nathan Sykes sketch), but oh well, I guess it just means people appreciate my work? :P Actually... those aren't the only photos. Some of the photos I took of them back when they were in Malaysia are floating around Tumblr too! But, it's alright.

Which now... brings me to another point.

What was yesterday's date?

18th April, no?

You know what that means?

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY

NATHAN JAMES SYKES!

Well, well, well, what do ya know? Finally ol' baby Nath (little ironic there, heh) is finally 18 and legal. He's gonna start getting so drunk and wasted with Tom and Jay, suffer from hangovers and be having random sex all the time. Okay, well... if he has random sex, then I'll be a little worried. I still can't believe that he's all grown up. I hate to sound like a mum, but I just had to say it! Happy 18th Nath, and I hope you had a good one. Judging from all the tweets, I'm sure you did. Hey, Jay's hangover lasted him 2 days, I hope you cope better :P And for Nath's birthday, I made a necklace :)

Can I just say that this boy is living the dream? He's so young, and so successful, doing what he wants with his life... Oh wait, I sound like I'm describing Justin Bieber, am I not?

That's right, ladies and gentlemen! Just 2 more days! 2 more days to Justin Bieber Live in KL! I'm so excited, I'm so hyped! I just can't wait to see this boy perform live! Back when I just got the ticket, I was really wishing to be able to meet the boy face to face and stuff like that. But now, not so. The Wanted may not be as famous as he is, but meeting them was all I needed. TW over Bieber any day, sorry Beliebers. That's just my opinion though, I'm still a fan of JB! Can't wait to rave and get in the groove with my mates. The thought of dressing up to go to the venue, that's the best. THURSDAY, 21ST APRIL, here I come.

And on a completely unrelated note, I've been really busy watching Misfits these days. I just recently got caught up with the series, and I finished both seasons in only a week!

A freakin' kick-ass series. Really violent, obscene and filled with sex, but at the same time, really hilarious too! God, I love it. I could be obsessed with this just as much as I am obsessed with How I Met Your Mother! I am going to try my best to make the show sound as amazing as it is, but you know I just can't. It's something that you have to watch to understand and feel. Don't even bother looking up the synopsis on the internet. It makes the show sound like a cheesy shit Nickelodeon show.

A group of kids doing community service get struck by lightning during a storm, and begin to develop superpowers.

What kind of shitty synopsis is that!? Do not get taken in by that short sentence! The show is so chnsdjvbksdjvbsdkvnasdjvasdv, WATCH IT! NOW! It's now stopped at Season 2, and they're going to release a third season. But fuck it man, Robert Sheehan won't be in Misfits anymore.

Robert Sheehan plays Nathan Young, a womanizing, sex-hungry, egoistic, annoying little dickhead prick in the show, whose power is immortality. "Yeah, that's off the A-list." And because he's a wanker and a little dick, he's my utmost favourite character in the show ♥ That was kinda weird and ironic, isn't it? But seriously, his dead dry and sarcastic jokes makes the show really fun to watch. Sure I love all the other characters, but it just won't be the same anymore without him, ya know? It's like watching How I Met Your Mother without Neil Patrick Harris. What kind of tragic catastrophe would that be!?

But what I like most about Misfits is how there are 5 different characters of different personalities and backgrounds who come together to become really close friends, even though they tend to treat each other like shit. The show stays grounded and so real, and you can actually see the different lifestyles of different people in the series, it's amazing.

Aaaaand, that's it. I should probably shut up about Misfits now. And I think I've come to the end of my blog post too. Oh wow, I can't believe I finally wrote a whole blog post. It's been so long since I last done that.

Iwan Rheon, he's like a handsome shark.

PS: I miss Aryni Jamaluddin.

red nose day!

2011-03-19T15:22:00.002+08:00

It's been so long since I last updated my blog. Mainly cause I found nothing to talk about. I mean, nothing can top the days I spent with The Wanted. So I've decided to write this blog post commemorating RED NOSE DAY, which was yesterday!

First of all, what kind of post for Comic Relief would it be if I did not post up the official single of 2011 for it?

The Wanted's Gold Forever!

Be sure to order their single here!

http://bit.ly/GF-iTunes

There are many things I noticed in that video, which I shall list out here because I have nothing better to do, and I love rewatching this video over and over since it makes me undeniably happy :)

Tom and Nathan got a haircut!
Nathan's really awesome and sexy jacket
Nathan looking briefly at the staircase at 0:44. Afraid of falling eh, Nath?
Tom stealing someone's red nose at 1:27
Jay's adorable laugh at 1:31
The girl in white forgetting her dance steps at 1:41
Nathan staring at one of the dancer's ass at 1:51
Max and Tom crawling on the floor at the same time
Jay's goofy dance and Max's funny face at 1:55
Max lip-syncing with Tom on his back and Siva dancing in the background at 2:00
Jay grinding a dancer at 2:02
Tom's "butterfly, butterfly" dance at 2:04
The man in the room in the background at the same time dancing HAHA!
Everyone in the background during Max's "We're standing in a light that won't fade..." verse
Someone is totally touching Siva at 2:47
The guy in white in the background at 3:02
The guy in purple dancing at 3:03!
Siva's funny run at 3:09
Tom looking at Max at 3:32

That's what I noticed so far, maybe there are many other things that have gone unnoticed. And as tribute to one of the best bands in the world, I did a cover for Gold Forever too a while ago :)

And of course, the boys performed on Comic Relief too :)

I actually cried watching this because I remembered the fact that just before they went on stage to perform this, they had a Ustream session with the fans. We saw Jay and Siva change, Max change his pants, Siva and Tom playing the guitar, Tom singing Iris and Nathan asking if he should have his fringe up or down. And from the above video, he obviously went with an "up" hairdo.

So you're probably wondering why I cried at the fact that they had a Ustream session.

It's because, I feel so attached. Before they went on stage, they had a chat with their fans, asked how they were doing, asked for opinions on what to wear, what to do. How the hell am I supposed to NOT feel attached to this band? They care. They actually genuinely do give 2 flying fucks about their fans. It feels like I was there with them when they were getting ready to perform, but instead, there was a computer screen between us.

And then it all came rushing back. How they treated their fans when we met them. How nice they were, how gentle and funny they were. How they made us laugh, cracked jokes. How Siva carried me and every small detail of what happened when they were here just came rushing back. Laser tag, showcase, hotel, airport. EVERYTHING.

Apart from that, there was also the fact that just a year ago, these boys were nobodies trying to make the best out of their lives. And now, look at where they are now? Supporting act for Justin Bieber along with Willow Smith, releasing the official single for Comic Relief 2011, and an upcoming tour. And that's not all! There's so much stuff going on, I don't even know where to start. I seriously feel like a proud momma watching these boys grow. They're all the way in the UK, and I'm here in Asia, but the internet is truly a wonderful thing. It's the only form of communication I'll ever have with the boys, UNTIL they come back. Which *fingers crossed* will happen again someday :)

Comic Relief is HUGE, and I'm just so happy for the boys that they managed to get involved in something like this. My heart goes out to you, seriously. I love you boys so much, I can't even start to explain it.

And so yeah, watching that one video gave me all these thoughts, thats why I started crying. Who would've thought that one band can have such a great impact on me. Never knew it was possible, until The Wanted.

Oh, and then I've found some people talking about how Gold Forever isn't a good song yadayada.

Well, here's the deal. The song was sung with good intentions, to raise money for people, and help the unfortunate. Even if you think that it isn't a good song, don't be a dick and download it to donate to charity, will you? Don't sit around and start complaining. How the hell can you judge a song that was made for a good cause, you retarded fucks? Well god bless you, and I hope YOU did something funny for money :)

But on a lighter note, here are the boys on Autumnwatch, being merciless mammals biting Olly Murs!

Since this is about Red Nose Day, I'd also like to share one of the many Comic Relief sketches that I found really hilarious! Guest-starring JLS!

And of course, what kind of blog post would this be if I had not added in The Wanted's latest cover? They performed this at Live Lounge, presenting Animals by Neon Trees!

So yeah, I hope everyone had a good Red Nose Day! :D

Oh wait! Do any of you happen to remember Augmented Reality?

I tried it like... last 2 months? It was fun :D

You can try it out here! http://www.rednoseday.com/fun-and-games/red-nose-augmented-reality

road to the wanted.

2011-02-24T23:05:00.002+08:00

19th February 2011

So me, Yaya, Cikgu Amiza and Nazhif took a chance and decided to go to KLIA in hopes that we can meet the boys from The Wanted when they land. We don't know what time they were arriving, we just estimated. The only thing we knew was that they would end everything they have in Singapore at 6.30pm. So we were on the road by 6pm, on the way to KLIA, not knowing that it'll be the greatest student-teacher trip ever.

It was really chaotic in the car, but thank God we all survived, and we managed to reach KLIA in one piece. It was an interesting ride there. When we arrived, it was still early 7-ish pm, so we went to eat first. The babies made a huge mess at the table, but it didn't really matter :P And let me just say that Blueberry Pie tastes AWESOME.

Right after that, Cikgu Amiza brought her children and Nazhif to the surau to pray, while me and Yaya went downstairs to the Arrival Hall to look at flight times from Singapore. We kept waiting and waiting, and we almost lost all hope. When Nazhif and Cikgu Amiza came back, we still continued waiting by the Arrival Hall for any sign of the boys at all. We basically just loitered around. Then, using the free WiFi access in KLIA, Yaya went online, and so did Nazhif. Universal Music Malaysia and Jin from Hitz.fm updated their Twitter saying that the boys should be arriving soon, so we just continued waiting.

Suddenly, Cikgu Amiza said "Eh, is that them?" while pointing to a group of people. She doesn't even know how the boys look like, but lo and behold, I saw Max walking out. I started going in a frenzy and told Yaya, but in the beginning she didn't believe it. I dragged her to the gate where they would be coming out from, and yes, indeed it was the boys from The Wanted. I wanted to scream in excitement, but luckily I didn't. Instead I just froze in my spot and covered my wide open mouth with my hands when I saw Nathan pushing his luggage. Yaya waved and had to drag me to them. That's how frozen I was.

The boys came towards us and hugged us one by one. The first thing I said when I hugged Siva was, "Oh my god, you're so attractive!" All he did was laugh, smiled and said "Thank you! You too!" Honestly, at that moment, I was such a wreck, I was so nervous. I couldn't feel my tongue, it was numb! I can't believe they're finally in front of me. I told Jay that I expected there to be more fans, but he said he didn't expect there to be any at all! So the boys are really thankful that there are actually people willing to wait for them. I asked Jay was was Singapore, and he said "It was beautiful! But it was so hot! Is it any hot here in Malaysia too?" Unfortunately boys, yes it is :P

We chatted for quite a bit. I said I would be at laser tag tomorrow, and asked if they were any good at it. Max said he was the best in the world (pshh, yeah right). They asked about me, and I said that tomorrow would be my first time playing. "Oh, that's good then. We're planning to win anyway. I can just run up to you and whack you in the head with the laser gun!" Yeap, that was what Nathan said to me. But he changed his mind when I told him that I have the right to sue him for doing that :P

And I think most people know that it's in our Malay tradition to kiss an older person's hand as a sign on respect, so when Cikgu Amiza asked her daughter to "salam abang" (abang means brother in Malay), her daughter went up to each of them and kissed their hand. I can't really remember who, but one of the boys said "Oh my god, you have to shake her hand, she'll kiss it!" I asked Max if he thought that her daughter was cute, and he said "She's beauuuutiful!"

I didn't notice, but then Tom left the airport first. Jay said he left to get a breath of fresh air. So we just continued talking to the rest of the boys. Let me just say that each and every one of them is so attractive in real life, pictures and videos actually DO NOT do them justice. They're actually really tall too! Especially Siva and Jay, except for Nathan :P I'm sorry Nath!

Nathan said he looked horrible in this photo. I know, he's just so full of rubbish. He's gorgeous. After that, I was talking to someone (I can't really remember who), and Nathan came up behind me and put his arms around my shoulder and rested his head on mine. So I took advantage of that opportunity to whip out my camera and take a photo with him. When I held the camera up, he asked "What are you doing?" but then he saw that I was taking a photo, so we posed :)

Right after that first photo, I took the second one, and Nathan still has the nerve to say that he thinks he looks horrible in it. That guy is full of nonsense, seriously! Doesn't he have a mirror at home? How can he not know he's beautiful? I also told him that there is something that I wish to give to him the next day, and that it's especially for him since it's also a Sykes Sunday. Afterwards, I helped Cikgu Amiza take a photo of her with the boys :)

Cikgu Amiza told them that she thought they were from the US, but Max corrected her and said they were from UK. He also mentioned that he was from Manchester, and Cikgu Amiza daringly said "I'm sorry, but I don't like Manchester United." You go gurl! :B

Siva: Aww, she's so small, I can just carry her and use her as a human shield!

In that last photo, Nazhif wanted a solo picture of him with the band, but I just had to barge in. I never noticed that Nath was pointing at me until I went back home and looked through all the photos carefully. After that, the boys had to go leave to their hotel. We all hugged goodbye, and Siva carried me. Gosh, I'm so small compared to this man! They walked to their vans, and Siva gave us all a flying kiss goodbye :) Jay even asked Nazhif for his name! That was the end of the night, but it wasn't the end of the road.

20th February 2011

I got up pretty early to get ready for Laser Tag with The Wanted at Galactic Laser, Midvalley. To be honest, I was more nervous of playing Laser Tag for the first time instead of meeting the band. Crazy right? I know. That's what most people at laser tag thought when I told them that. The boys were so friendly yesterday, I wasn't really intimidated to meet them again, I felt more "BRING IT ON BOYS!!".

When the boys were about to come out of the media room, everyone was standing by the sides trying to take photos, get autographs and hugs, and also photos taken with the boys. I was standing somewhere near the end of the line. Tom didn't notice me because he was looking on the floor. Max, Nathan, Siva and Jay all recognized me and we all automatically exchanged hugs. It was really good to see the boys again :) Then they went straight into the briefing room. Everyone was going crazy and there was "OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!" all around me. I was looking at everyone have a great time meeting the boys. Their reactions were hilarious but still amazing to see. The boys have pretty dedicated fans!

When it came to Advertlets winners' turn to play laser tag with the boys, we waited in the briefing room. The boys walked in and once again, every one just went nuts! And because I didn't want to get dragged into that mess and die under pressure, I sat on the couch and just waited till things settled down a lil bit. Max noticed me first, so I hugged him, followed by Jay, Siva, Tom and lastly Nathan. They were all so sweaty, and Nathan warned that it could get really hot in the arena. He also mentioned that they owned the previous team.

When the instructor asked us all to settle down, that was when we all kept quiet. I sat next to Nathan and reminded him of the present I wished to give to him, and he said "Aww, that's sweet of you." But forget all that sweetness. When it was announced that Group E, the group I was in, was the Blue team, Max automatically went "BOOOOOOOO!" and the rest of The Wanted followed suit. I told Nathan "Hey, that's not nice. I'm in Group E!" and all he could say was "Oh really? Well, you're gonna lose, and we're gonna win. We're gonna win real badly." Well sure, bring it on ;)

Just before we entered the arena, Nathan announced to all of us "Good luck! You're gonna need it!" Ain't he cocky? Haha :P But oh well, in the end, The Wanted did kick ass real badly. I kept getting shot by Jay. He stayed in the same position the whole time. Nathan's tactic was to stay on top. I only remember shooting one member from The Wanted, and that was Max. I was hiding in between two walls, because I could have sworn I thought I was gonna faint. The moment I left from my hiding spot, I saw Max, shot him and hid again. The game went on for only a short 8 minutes, but it was so much fun while it lasted.

At the end of the game, Jay gave me a high five, and his palms were REALLY sweaty. We got out to check the scoreboard. I was standing behind Nathan, then he turned around to say "Hey, hey! Is it just me... or did we score SO MUCH BETTER than all of you combined?" Okay, I can't deny it, but the boys owned us, trashed us in laser tag. It's unfair alright! They get to go in first!

Photos below are courtesy of their respective owners :)

After laser tag with the boys, there were other groups playing with them too. While waiting outside, Josh, a blogger from Advertlets, said that he saw my drawing, and he's going to try help give me the chance to hand it to Nathan personally. He spoke to Abby from Universal Music for me, THANK YOU SO MUCH JOSH!!

It's such a pity that the last photo was blur! It could have made a really cute pic of Nath :/ So after all the games are over, I was taking photos of the band when they left the arena, and I got a tap on the shoulder. It was Abby from UMM, and she asked if I got my stuff done. I said I have not, and she brought me into the room where all the press and media were. The boys rested in there after their game of laser tag. I never thought I was able to go in there. Just before this, there were people wishing they were inside with the boys, and here I am.

I was standing, and Siva went to sit on a stool behind me. I took out the drawing I wanted to give to Nathan from my bag, and I hear Siva say "Wow, that is amazing!" He was the first band member to see it :) Abby and I tried to call Nathan over several times, but he was always talking too loud to one of the boys. But when we finally got his attention, Abby told him that there was something I needed to give to him. Nathan then gave me an acknowledging "Oh yeah!", as if he remembered about what I told him at the airport and in the briefing room earlier on.

I was holding the folder with the sketch inside, and Nathan reached his hand out to grab it, but I stopped him and said "Before I give this to you, you have to promise me to take care of it. Because it's really flimsy, and it took a lot of effort to get done." Nathan gave me a nod, and I took it out and showed it to him. He took it from me delicately, and said "Oh wow. Wow this is... Oh my god, this is amazing!" He then hugged me, and asked me if I drew this myself, free-hand, and then thanked and hugged me again. His reaction was really priceless and flattering, I'm glad he liked my sketch :) Oh, and he apologized for hugging me when he's sweaty. Are you kidding me? Sweaty or not, I got to hug THE Nathan Sykes!

There were some other people who took a photo of me, Nathan and that sketch, although I don't know who they were. When they were all done, Nathan was looking at that sketch, and he said this, "Okay, here's what. I PINKIE PROMISE you, that I'll take care of this drawing. AND, I'll put it up in my room too, okay?" Still don't believe that I've made a pinkie promise with Nathan before, but really, thank you so much Nath :) After that, I asked if I could take a photo with him, and why would such a sweetheart like him say no? :)

He told me he looked horrible in that photo. I know right, it's almost like he thinks he looks bad in every photo I take. So he told me to snap another one. And this was the outcome.

I'm happy with both photos, but it seems like Nathan preferred the second one because he got no complaints this time. Seriously, this boy should know he's beautiful.

I pretty much stayed in that room the whole time they were there. I spoke to Jay and Siva for a while, and asked when were they leaving Malaysia. They said they have something on tomorrow (Monday) so maybe on Tuesday morning. I asked what time, and they said "We don't know. We don't even WANT to know, because we don't want to leave!" Tom then noticed me, and came up to me for a hug. He was wearing a singlet, which means you can actually see his sweaty pits. He was being all gross by brushing his pit hair, and trying to wipe it on me. It was hilarious though :P After that, Jay had to attend to someone who called him, so I took that chance to take a photo with Siva. However, I told him that he might need to bend down, because I was obviously too short. Siva then got down on one knee, and took a photo with me :)

When Siva got up, he looked down at me, and said this "You look like a Disney character!" I still don't understand why, but he did mention something about the eyes, nose and mouth. After that, the boys took photos with the press and media people.

They weren't in there for very long, but long enough to have some of the fans outside leave to Curve already to get ready for their showcase. When they boys left the room, there wasn't much commotion outside. Dev said that maybe the fans got used to it. I still think maybe it's because the crazy fans left to Curve :P After that, Dev, Siti, Brit, Nadia and me went to buy a box for the gift that they were planning to give the boys. Nadia then drove to Curve, while the rest of us went there with Brit's mum. THANKS FOR THE RIDE! :) If I hadn't made such nice friends, I would probably be in a cab alone, but I'm glad I was travelling with really wonderful people!

When we reached Curve, the first person I saw at the Laundry Bar was Elora. And then I saw the rest of my babies there ♥ I finally got reunited with Nini, Yaya, Dolly, Elora and Nazhif! So since I already got my showcase passes from someone from MJuice during Laser Tag, I didn't take my extra passes from Advertlets. Instead, I lined up and wanted to make sure I secured somewhere in first row. I mean, come on! I wanna see my boys perform! But before that, me, Nini and Dev went to grab something to eat for just a short while.

The entrance finally opened, and we all rushed in, trying to get the best spots. After much shifting, I finally got a spot behind Yaya, who was first row, right next to the bars, where the boys will be walking in from afterwards. Everyone was getting excited, and Jin from Hitz.fm was working up the crowd by asking them to "make some noise". There was even a short competition to win autographed CDs from the boys. And when the time came, the boys walked in from the Laundry Bar entrance. Nathan noticed me, and Jay even gave a little wink ;)

The boys started off the showcase with their 3rd single, Lose My Mind.

It was the only video I got of them, because I wanted to spend the rest of my time enjoying their showcase. But here are other videos and photos from the concert :)

Setlist:
Lose My Mind
Behind Bars
Iris
Say It On The Radio
Heart Vacancy
All Time Low

It was an amazing showcase, as expected from the boys :) Sure the showcase was kinda short, but it was worth it. I even got serenaded by Nathan for a short while during All Time Low. Sure it wasn't for very long, and I don't have a photo of it, but I definitely do have the most beautiful image of Nathan in my mind ♥ I sure wish they sang Personal Soldier and Replace Your Heart, or maybe even Weakness or Made. Or even better, their whole album. But that would have been a concert and not a showcase :P

So when the showcase was over, Nini really desperately wanted to take photos with the boys. So did Elora and Dolly, since they didn't get to tag along to meet the boys at the airport the day before. People were lining up in front of the stage, trying to get photos with them, but I had a better idea. Sure, it might sound a little stalker-ish to do this, but we decided to wait at their hotel lobby instead. It's not considered stalker-ish if it's an info that most people know right? Instead of waiting like the others, we left the showcase straightaway, but got caught by NTV7 on the way out to get interviewed for a short while. I honestly don't know when it's going to air, and I don't want to look at myself on TV either! Pretty embarrassing if you ask me :P

The 6 of us squeezed into one taxi and asked the driver to send us to One World Hotel. We waited outside the hotel for a while, before the doorman asked if we were waiting for The Wanted. Our reaction? "The Wanted? Who's The Wanted? We're not waiting for them!" Nini even said "I'm looking for my dad!" then she proceeded to open the door and shout "DADDY? DADDY WHERE ARE YOU?" However, the doorman then told us that we weren't the first people to have waited for the band, there was another group who came this morning, but never got to meet the boys. They even said that there were 2 entrances to the hotel.

We just sat at the hotel lobby, long enough to get thirsty. Dolly and Elora went to One Utama to buy some stuff for us, while Nini, Nazhif, Yaya and I waited. After waiting for around half an hour and almost losing all hope, Yaya and Nazhif noticed the guitarist from The Wanted's showcase walk in. From there, we pretty much got excited and looked at the door. The first person I saw was Siva, and Nini suddenly screamed "NATHAN!!" I asked her to shut it, not cause I don't allow her to scream his name, but the hotel started echoing! The boys walked in, and we waved and walked towards them.

Max walked towards Nini, and asked if she was okay. I think it's because she was so overwhelmed to meet them that she LOOKED like she was about to cry. We all exchanged hugs and chatted a bit, and then Dolly and Elora joined us right on time. Yaya got the chocolates which she wanted to give to Max and Jay. Jay thanked her for it, and then smashed the chocolate against his head, and then he continued breaking the pieces. "It's easier to eat it this way!" He then thanked Yaya in Malay :) He also said "I hope I don't finish this chocolate by tonight. Tidak!" Isn't that cute?

I think we were down there with them for around a good 15 to 30 minutes, just chilling and chatting away. I can't really remember what happened in order, but let me put it in point forms, NOT in chronological order ;)

Big Kev and Nath stole Max's chocolate, and Max complained to Yaya
Nazhif pinched Jay's cheeks
Jay saying that I have Siva's cheekbones!
Getting tickled by Jay when I was about to take a photo of Yaya with Max
Siva and Nathan acknowledging me as "Disney girl" (Yeah, thanks Seev!)
Jay re-enacting what happened in Laser Tag to Yaya and Nazhif
Nathan casually walking up behind me, putting his arm around my shoulder and resting his head on mine
Nazhif and Yaya's reaction to Nathan's action above :P
Nini being nervous in front of Siva and talking about dogs
Teaching Max that "The Wanted" in Malay is "Yang Dikehendaki"
Also teaching Max that "You're beautiful" is "Awak cantik."
Jay learning how to say "So happy to meet you" in Malay, "Gembira jumpa awak."
Jay learning what "Ya" and "Tidak" means
Nini touching Siva and Tom's abs
Getting a kiss from Tom outside the hotel ♥

I think there was more, but I might need some time to remember it all. It was a great experience just talking to the band at the hotel :) I swear the boys are really friendly! And they're really fun to talk to too! But I think that has been pretty obvious since the beginning of this post :)

Thank you Jay for snapping this!

Thanks Seev for this photo!

"Yeah it's so early, I think I might need to go to the airport looking like this."

Seev took this himself! And thank you Nath for barging in like that :P

After that, the boys had to go get ready for their dinner :) For those wondering why there weren't many Tom photos, it's because while we were in the hotel with the rest of the band, he was outside talking on the phone. When we left, we saw him, and we got a little excited for a while, before we told each other to shut up to respect the fact that he was kinda busy. Then he took photos with us, and we talked for a short while. Before he went into the hotel, he kissed all of us on the cheek, except for Elora. I guess Elora was jealous, which was why she screamed "KISS ME! KISS ME!" before Tom entered the building. And she got what she asked for, a kiss from him :') Aww. After that we went to One Utama for dinner since we were all so hungry, and my dad came at around 10.30pm to fetch us and send us all home.

21st February 2011

I'm not going to lie, Sunday was the best day and night of my life, but when Monday came, we all hit an all time low. I kept on crying in class knowing that they were leaving soon, and Nazhif and Yaya felt the same way too. They felt more like friends now instead of just a boyband that we admire. If they weren't half as nice as they are, we probably wouldn't give 2 shits that they were leaving, but they were just different. I cried my eyes out in front of Ms Reen, and I couldn't concentrate in class during BM because I was too busy trying to wipe my tears. Apparently, my teacher thought that I was sleepy. It never crossed her mind that I was crying.

Throughout the whole day, I tried to think of ways to see them just one more time before they left to the UK. I begged my dad to go to the hotel, and he didn't allow me to. Any chances of going to the airport was a no-no. I cried and cried the whole day. I had no mood to eat, to drink, I just tried sleeping to drown out the pain. Then at night, I saw them on 8TV Quickie, and I missed them even more. After that was done, Jin from Hitz.fm tweeted that the the boys were heading back on a 10am flight.

And there I was again, trying to think of how to get there, who to send me there. That was when Nadia tweeted me telling me that she's going to the airport. I told her straightaway that I was going, but the problem was, I haven't told my parents yet. I just went to sleep and hoped for the best.

I woke up at 5 in the morning, and I knocked on Umi's door. Obviously, she was still asleep and in a bad mood, and I begged her to let me go to the airport. She said I was going too far, and I should ask Abah. So I did, and he told me to go and have fun. THANK YOU ABAH FOR UNDERSTANDING ME! ♥

Nadia came at around 6.30am, and we went to Kazmira's place first to get her present for Jay, and after that, we were on the road. We reached at approximately 7, and waited for the boys outside the Departure Hall. Nadia kept checking Twitter, and we finally got a lead from one of her friends who said the boys had just left the hotel. At around 8+ they finally arrived at the airport. I hugged Jay and Siva first, followed by Tom and Max. Not Nath, cause he was too busy on the phone. I gave Jay Kazmira's present for him, and he opened it in front of me and Nadia. He seemed really flattered with it :)

Jay seemed to be the only person who was talkative at the airport. He even said that he and Seev tried to get back to UK time, so they slept late. He also told me about the things they did the night before and showing me photos of it too, like taking photos around town, eating "Roti Canai", going to a fish spa (which Jay calls "getting my feet eaten by fish") and also trying durians for the first time. How can he say that they taste horrible!? I mean, I can understand a horrible smell, but horrible taste? Tsk tsk, Jay, how could you!

Oh, and I'm flattered that Jay remembered me from laser tag! He asked me if my legs ached, so I asked why, and he said "Remember during laser tag, you were in the blue team and we were red? And I was hiding in one spot, always shooting at you? Yeah, my legs ache from that." I thought I was the only person who remembered always getting killed by Jay :P

When Nathan was done talking on the phone, I walked over to him to give him a hug. Right after that, he put his hands on his face and started complaining about how tired he was. Poor boy, slept at around 3 or 4 in the morning, and had to wake up at 5. You can actually see how tired he is just by looking at him. At that point, they were already kinda late for their flight so they had to rush in. Before they left, I took a last photo with the whole band. While we were getting ready, Nath stood behind me and started shaking me back and forth slowly. I just gave him a soft acknowledging pat on the hand :) I sure hope the boy got his rest on the plane!

When they had to go, I gave them all a hug goodbye. They all promised to come back one day. I hugged Siva last. I thought he was going to spin me around or something, but instead he carried me with one hand and walked towards the airport entrance saying "Jay! Let's bring her back to the UK with us! She's so light!" I sure wished he did. Me and Nadia then followed them in, but just watching them from afar. When they went down the escalator to leave, Max and Tom waved, Nath gave us a flying kiss goodbye and Seev made a sad pout-y face. Seev was also the last to leave, so when he was already almost out of sight, he waved at me and Nadia. The last wave we'll ever get from any of them.

The ride back home was really quiet and solemn. I think Nadia and I both felt the same way. We were pretty devastated that the boys left, but I'm happy I managed to be there to see them off. I went back home, went to sleep, looked at my handphone wallpaper of Nath, Seev and me. I can remember how happy those boys made me, and all I did was cry. But crying won't do it. I ended up falling asleep, broken.

But now, I'm feeling better. I'm happy that this all happened, instead of always being depressed that it's over. The boys have given me the weekend of my life just by being here. I miss them, I really do. It was an honor to be in the presence of people so friendly like them. They treated fans more like friends. If most artists were like them, then I think the world would be a much happier place. They were really hilarious too, always cracking up some dumb joke for people to laugh at. They are in fact, some of the nicest people in the world that I have ever met. If they were really stuck-up like some artists, I bet I wouldn't even care if they left. But the fact that people like them can only come once in a while really saddens me, which was why I kept crying.

The Wanted are like best friends that I never had. I don't care if they don't remember my name, remember my face or remember me at all, or remember any of the things they've ever said to me. All I know is that these are memories that I won't let go, and I want to thank these boys so much for making it the best weekend of my life, and for being as nice as they are. Promise me you'll stay the way you are. ♥

I love you boys so much, and so does Malaysia.

Come back soon? :)

The memory of being here with you is one I'm gonna take my life through,

Cause some days stay gold forever ♥

ready to rumble?

2011-02-19T11:48:00.002+08:00

I quote in the words of Barney Stinson:

"You are not a man until you have played a game of laser tag."

So here's the time for me to MAN UP (even though I'm a lady) and finally play laser tag, for the first time, in Midvalley, tomorrow with none other than...

THE WANTED! ♥

The thought of me playing laser tag with them is so surreal. I never thought this day would come but, syukur alhamdulillah, Allah answered my prayers. I still need some time to take it all in, everything that happened yesterday during Haziq's birthday is so overwhelming. I will post about Haziq's birthday in a different post altogether, so just bare with me for now.

And of course, how can I not mention THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO HAD LIKED MY LINK! And special thanks to those who helped me spread the word around :) If it wasn't for you guys, I doubt I'll be given this opportunity. I am so thankful, and... so excited beyond words.

I'm so used to seeing artists and bands on YouTube, but the thought of meeting them face-to-face is still hard to believe. Every time I think about it, my heart sinks a little. It doesn't sink because I feel sad, but it sinks because... I don't know! I wonder what'll go down tomorrow. I get butterflies thinking about it. It's THE WANTED. Seriously, did I really get this chance?! I'm guessing that I didn't get to meet my favourite artists these previous times because Allah was already planning something greater for me. Alhamdulillah.

This will be a weekend that I'll never forget.
I am so thankful right now, you have no idea.
I guess miracles do happen.

the wanted.

2011-02-11T22:04:00.001+08:00

See these boys? Yeah, they're new, but they're amazing. They're not just boys with a pretty face, but Jay, Nathan, Tom, Max and Siva all have their own unique voices, which when blended together creates such beautiful harmony that never fails to leave me breathless. Boybands have been long dead, but these boys brought it back and made it BETTER. They're the new age Westlife, Backstreet Boys and N*Sync, except with more soul. With really sexy British accents.

I'm not going to say this because I think they're all so stunning and handsome, which THEY ARE! But the reason why I love them so much is because their music is just so catchy. I literally fell in love when I heard "All Time Low" on the radio, and that was even before I knew how they looked like. And how they look like is a plus point, a big bonus, because they're all so charming. Oh, and not to mention that they're really funny too! Their YouTube videos are what keeps me going these days, because every single antic the boys pull never fail to leave me smiling from ear-to-ear.

I can see really big things in the future for these boys. They're young, handsome and talented. Oh, and British too ♥ I pray all the best for them, and I can't wait for the day they're here in Malaysia :) I really hope I get to meet them then, because there is something that I would like to give. Which brings me to my other point, Nathan Sykes.

I'm not going to lie, out of a group of 5 really dashing young men, it's pretty hard to choose a favourite. In fact, I don't even want to choose a favourite, but sometimes, things like these come on their own. And everyone knows how I have a weakness for men with really reeeeeally good voices. And even though everyone in this band has an amazing voice, the fact that Nathan is young and has one of the deeper voices is such a turn on for me. Okay, that didn't really come out right, but I think you understand what I mean. Justin Bieber is my age, and sounds like a young boy, BUT he still sings really well, which is why I like him. But Nathan is a year older than me and the Biebs, yet he has this deep and alluring voice that draws me in.

Yes, seems like the boys just made themselves a loyal fan. *points to self*

I LOVE THE WANTED ♥

himym.

2011-02-06T01:37:00.002+08:00

My current obsession. Yes, I'm pretty slow to just suddenly get hooked on this show, but I'm glad I did. Better late than never. My nights have been nothing but watching back to back episodes of this series, all the way from Season 1. And like most people, my favourite character is none other than Barney Stinson, played by Neil Patrick Harris. He's just hilarious, and so... cynical, in that witty way. Best part? He's gay! Well, not in the series of course, but in real life. That's a plus factor for me.

He is so...

LEGEN-

wait for it...

DARY!

god bless.

2011-02-05T00:40:00.000+08:00

Am I nice enough for you now? Hehhh. This photo was taken the night I went to Solat Hajat with my girls at Masjid Bukit Jelutong. Not like I'll be wearing tudung for the rest of my life anytime soon, but I can really see myself with it in the future :) Insya'allah.

My close friends might have heard about this dilemma I've had these past few days, and even though some of my readers don't know what it's about, I just want to make it known that MY MIND HAS BEEN MADE UP. I'm not going to let go of someone amazing for... yeah. Awesomeness lives far away, and that's where my heart is. My plan now is to help make things work for person B and her ;)

I'm no longer a sad and confused little kiddo. In fact, I am happy. Really happy. As happy as I was back when there was only me and you, and no one in between. And I hope things will stay that way. Maybe not forever, but I don't want them to end anytime soon.

Thank you :) I finally re-discovered the reasons why I loved you so much ♥

cold as you.

2011-01-31T18:08:00.002+08:00

You have a way of coming easily to me.

And when you take, you take the very best of me.

So I start a fight 'cause I need to feel something.

And you do what you want 'cause I'm not what you wanted.

You put up walls and paint them all a shade of gray.

And I stood there loving you and wished them all away.

And you come away with a great little story

of a mess of a dreamer with the nerve to adore you.

You never did give a damn thing, honey.

But I cried, cried for you.

And I know you wouldn't have told nobody

if I died, died for you.

Oh, what a shame.

What a rainy ending give to a perfect day.

Every smile you fake is so condescending counting all the scars you made.

Now that I'm sittin here thinkin' it through,
I've never been anywhere cold as you.

fight through the hurt.

2011-01-31T01:38:00.001+08:00

FINALLY GOT IT!
Yes, I never fail to mention something about JB in my blog post.
But this photo will be about it.

These past few days have been crazy. I went to solat hajat with my girls (photos soon), and it is with much shame that I say it was the first time I ever stepped into Masjid Bukit Jelutong. Yes, I am really serious in changing my ways. Alhamdulillah, thank God for 2011 :)

Does anyone know how it feels like to get your heart broken unknowingly? It's a sucky feeling, especially since that person can't know he broke your heart. But I don't blame anyone. I don't blame her. I don't blame him. What's important is not whether I get to be with him or not. What's important is that he changed me to be better, and that's all that counts ;) I am much thankful.

Oh, and I just got done watching High School of The Dead with Iskandar.

Pretty kick-ass anime. I recommend it to even those who don't watch anime :)

we live and we learn.

2011-01-23T23:33:00.000+08:00

YES, I GOT MY RM358 TICKET FOR JB'S MY WORLD TOUR! Thank you so so so so so much to my beloved dad and grandmother for chipping in money to get it for me ♥ Mission now is to pay them back :) I've made a promise, and I won't go against it.

So let's skip all this Bieber talk. I've been on it for days now, I bet people are getting bored. Nini slept over my house on Friday and Saturday and we watched Haunted Changi and also Aku Masih Dara.

Not gonna lie, these past few days, the presence of a particular person gave me the urge to change. That person didn't really say much, in fact, he didn't even say anything. It's just him being there that makes me feel like changing. So I've promised myself, Nini, Baba and my mum that once I'm done with my period, I want to learn to pray and read the al-Quran. That's a pretty drastic change in me seeing the way I usually behave. But I do seriously have the urge to change, and I WANT to.

Yeah yeah, I know, I can already hear people saying "Chehhh Shafiqah!" or "Mmmm, ye lah tu Shafiqah" or any other cynical remark, doubting my sincerity. But to whoever says that, SCREW YOU. No, I'm serious. It's getting annoying hearing people say that. I can do this, whether you believe me or not. I can understand if you said "Alhamdulillah" or something, but if you look down upon my goals, then I want you to leave ;)

And what else? Watching Aku Masih Dara made me want to change even more.

Oh, and no more Bieber photos :) Yesterday Nini and I had our own photoshoot by the field in Bukit Jelutong. These are my shots. For more, check out my Facebook!

jiebers, it's 3 months too early.

2011-01-19T01:39:00.002+08:00

APRIL 21ST 2011

I think by now a lot of crazy fangirls would know why this date is special. Wanna know why?

Because JUSTIN FREAKING BIEBER is coming to perform live in Malaysia, baby!

I don't know why I'm being too overexcited about it, seeing that I haven't even secured a ticket and I have no backstage pass. And the fact that the tickets are selling out really fast doesn't calm this anxiety in me. I am so scared that they'll run out of tickets, I can piss myself. They started selling JB tickets at Bangsar Village 2 on 15th January, and by 16th, all Rm498 tickets are sold out. TuneTalk just released news of 300 Rm1000 tickets being sold, and that got sold out too. I'm planning to get the one that's Rm358, and I shudder at the thought of when it'll get sold out. Oh God, I'm so... scared :/ Please, at least leave one ticket for me. I wanna go so badly.

A lot of people have asked me this, even my parents. "You like Justin Bieber? I thought..." Yeah yeah yeah, I know. I tend to look down on him, and before this (read: before this) I didn't really like him that much. But around 3 years ago, at the end of 2008, me and Nini started watching his videos. We were wondering how to pronounce "Bieber", we fell in love with that small boy, and we watched his videos religiously. But sooner or later, the hype died down, but we still loved that "little boy". At that point, we could've sworn that he was younger than us. Below is the first video I've ever watched of him. Back then, it has less than 100,000 views. Hell, maybe even less than 50,000. But now it has over 24 million hits.

And then a year later, I got a phone call from Nini telling me that she's seeing a really familiar face on MTV. So apparently, Justin Bieber is now famous. I was happy for him, really. But when he got so overrated, and everyone EVERYWHERE was crazy over him, it became kind of a trend to be in love with this new kid. So I decided to stay away from the norm, and try not to like him, even though before he was on MTV, me and Nini were big fans of his.

Maybe famous is an understatement for him. Who the hell doesn't know who Justin Bieber is? Be it haters or lovers, people still know him. And as much as I do not want to admit it, Justin Bieber is pretty talented. He IS undeniably handsome. And boys can keep talking about how he sounds like a girl, but remember that once in your life, you sounded like him once. Besides, it's that same voice that is helping him earn millions.

So, in celebration of Justin's concert here, I made this:

Yes, a Justin Bieber design. The photo is in .png format, and is transparent, so it might look a lil weird seeing that my blog background is gray. I'm planning to put this on a shirt and start selling it. It's still in discussion though. It was originally drawn on paper and coloured with purple pen, but then I scanned it and retouched it in Photoshop, so now it looks more like a graphic design :) I am really proud of this piece of work, I don't know why! It just seems really... pretty? If it was put on a shirt, it would look something like this:

Whoever wants one, please feel free to inbox me on Facebook, but please take note that everything is still in discussion. That includes price too.

I'm not one to go crazy over Justin Bieber, but I won't deny it. The moment I got news that Justin Bieber was coming to Malaysia, I went crazy. The next thing I knew, I was diagnosed with Bieber Fever. Singing nothing but his songs all day. Worst part is, I got it overnight. There's just something about this kid that's so enchanting. It's so easy for him to draw people in, and he's not that bad once you take the time to get to know him. Not personally, but you get what I mean. But as much as I love him now, I still think that a movie and an autobiography is a tad too fast for him.Come on, this kid is just insanely famous, he's not a legend yet or something.

Bieb's new book, First Step 2 Forever

Bieb's upcoming movie, Never Say Never

Don't wanna admit it, but I really wanna watch the movie, HAHA! I've seen a sneak peek of it, and it seems interesting. And I'm also in it for baby Bieber, cause he was such an adorable little kid when he was younger, awwww.

Oh yes, I didn't know Bieber Fever was this strong and crazy.

Here's my female interpretation of JB. I KNOW, FREAKY RIGHT?

And here's the last thing I would like to say:

Before you start bashing about how gay he is, remember that Justin Bieber is ONLY 16 (17 this year), and is already doing something with his life. You can tell me his voice sucks, or he sounds like a girl, but it's that same voice that helped him earn millions, which is of course, MORE than you can ever earn. Oh, and how can I ever forget to mention that he can get more girls than you in just a snap of a finger? He's a worldwide phenomenon, going around following his dream, and you're just a nobody hiding behind the screen bashing someone who's doing so much better than you :B

farewell, another year.

2010-12-31T19:02:00.002+08:00

GOODBYE TWENTY TEN!

So another year is coming to an end. I can't believe it's already the 31st of December. 2010 has truly been an unforgettable year, filled with so many ups and downs, and also the making of new and beautiful friendships. This was the year I got into 4 Lambda, a totally new class, and a whole new environment, different from all the previous forms. New friends, new teachers. It's also where I met wonderful people, people who never fail to make me smile every day during class. There are some things that happened this year that I can't forget, and today, right now, right here, I will be listing them all down here.

First of all, the breakup between Afif and me. Although to most it's nothing, it was pretty life-threatening to me. It felt like I had my whole life sucked out of me, like I lost all hope for living. This boy, Muhammad Afif, was my life, love, my all and everything, and he left. The first 2 weeks of it were hell, especially when everything I have and everywhere I go reminds me of him. He was an amazing person. I still miss him, sometimes, but I choose to let it go. I've lived my life before you, and I am sure that I can live my life after you too. But still, thanks for all the loving, for caring, for being so kind and so understanding. And during our course of breakup, thanks for believing in me. Thanks for believing that I have the strength to move on. So, true that. I picked up pretty much all the pieces and managed to look forward. You weren't a mistake. You made me stronger. This breakup could have been me, could have been you, but I do not want to blame anyone anymore, and I wish you all the best in everything you do :)

And here, let me list out all that I can remember out of 2010:

Hangout at Burger King with Nini, Dolly, Yaya, Izzat, Imran and Haziq
Going to Sunway almost every weekend, and meeting Dolly's new "friends"
Sleepovers with me, Nini and Haziq (Picture To Burn)
Spilling Maggie soup all over Nini's kitchen counter with Dolly and Yaya
Going to Singapore with Nini's family and staying over at Mummy Nana's
Nini's jemputan and meeting Era for the first time
Trying to find taxis in the middle of the night at Bugis on a Sunday with Nini and Min, and my $50
Being in Singapore for one week, finally getting to meet my family
And not forgetting meeting Atiqah, Luqman, Jaini, Danish, Nazihah (for the first time!), Aqilah, Ryan and Bavani
Surprise meet-up with Zhafri and Nadia during breakfast with Luqman
Walking around AMK park with Luqman, in which he missed sembahyang Jumaat, went into Courts and had a back-and-forth trip from AMK and Admiralty
Ikea with Atiqah and Luqman
Eating satay at Atiqah's place
My conflicts with Haziq
Argument with Nini over a stupid joke
7 Days moments with my girlfriends, and Haziq
TOKIO HOTEL LIVE IN MALAYSIA! ♥
ADAM LAMBERT'S GLAMNATION TOUR! ♥ and meeting Iqwal for the first time
Air Supply: Love Never Ends Tour with Akid
Acap moving to Melaka :(
Finally spending some time with my cuzzie ♥
MIG/dubbing trips with Nini, Haziq, Eleena and Kak Faith
Argument with Nazhif
Amital, Afiq, Alif and Akid's stay here for 5 days
Fight with Yuna
Kris Allen Live In Malaysia
Kuala Selangor with Nini and Acap's family
Swimming at Ilman's house
Ally's farewell
Midvalley with family and Haziq

And I noticed that I didn't update this blog about my stay in Singapore, but seeing now that it's the end of the year, I think it's a bit too late for that already. You can say that I had a great time there, and that can be seen from my photos in Facebook.

So now, let me take this time, to thank everyone that has been there with me through thick and thin.

My family; You know that nothing in the world can replace you. Umi, Abah, Baba, Iskandar and also Raaiqa. Although it may seem that I prioritize my friends more, but I want you guys to always know that I love you more than anything. You are everything that runs through my veins, and nothing can ever change that.

Nurul Aryni; For my best friend, my soul sister and my diary, thank you for sticking with me when everything was wrong, and also when everything was right. Other than my family, there is absolutely no other person that I would wish to share my happiness with, but you. Thanks for putting up with me, and I know that sometimes I can be a prick, but you know that through it all, I love you ♥ When we meet, the world shakes. You make me laugh like no other, and you can also see right through me. People come and go, but you stayed, and I thank you so much for that :)

And here's to the rest that deserve much recognition, and having a place in my heart. I would write a paragraph for each and everyone of you, but... Heh, I'm a lazy bitch, you all know that.

Atiqah Abdul Khalim ♥ Aqilah Suhaimi ♥ Danish Fawaz ♥ Jaini Nair ♥ Ryan Keith Almodiel ♥ Luqman Amirul Hakim ♥ Haziq Akashah ♥ Ungku Alynn Dalila ♥ Suraya Thornton ♥ Zulkarnain Aziz ♥ Hariz Ali ♥ Dhivaan Thanabalasingam ♥ Emir Fauzi ♥ Hafiz Kamal ♥ Nazhif Ramlan ♥ Madihah Johari ♥ Qistina Khalidah ♥ Shereen Reha ♥ Akid Rosli ♥ Mario Gruber ♥ Sakinah ♥ Shah Rezza ♥ Anirah Jamaluddin ♥ Fateeha Radzif ♥ Syed Izzat ♥ Imran Suhaimi

so you wanna be a rockstar?

2010-12-07T18:13:00.001+08:00

Don't go higher for desire.

Put it in your head, baby, Hollywood is dead.

This is going to be a really random and mundane post, so please do not expect much colours. It's just that, I need to jot down my thoughts somewhere. Haziq has signed a contract with MIG already, and it's starting to suck. Not that I do not support him in what he does, I do. I really do, and I am happy for him. But seeing the amount of things he has to hide, it... brings me down. Deletion of photos and stuff like that. It's not like I'm erasing him out of my life right? It's just photos. I don't know why even the thought of that makes me feel sad. I cried for a short while yesterday thinking about it.

What's happening to our teenage years? Your friends should remain anonymous, your life is supposed to be sealed in a box. You have to be what they want you to be. Before this, anything people thought of you was just bull, but now you have to take such good care of your reputation as it can be destroyed in a blink of an eye. And this is just photos. What's more to come? If you have to control the kind of photos you take, imagine what else in public? You have to control the way you behave. And putting me, Nini and Haziq together only equals to noise and fun. Controlling of behaviour? Hardly. It won't be the same anymore.

I remember the times the 3 of us used to talk about what we wanted to be. The two of them wanting to be actors and actresses, me on the other hand wanting to be a recording artiste. We get so excited at any chance we manage to grasp just to be what we want. And after yesterday, I don't know. Am I ready for this? Well, hell yeah, I'm ready to be who I want to be, but there's a price to pay for that. To do what I want to do, I have to trade privacy. My life. Friends. Quality time. And most importantly, family. I want to live doing what I love. But I don't want to let go of the who I love. Maybe this is the reason why a lot of celebrities sometimes wished they had normal lives. Oh wow, the beauty of what we're having right now. Life, as a commoner. I never noticed how amazing it is. Always so bedazzled by the glitz and glamour. That's all a facade. Deep inside, they're all tied down souls that have to be married to their jobs, committed to the media. Maybe it wasn't their choice, but it's the price they have to pay.

That doesn't change how badly I want to be a singer though. I'll do whatever it takes. I just hope that... I don't know, I just hope that I won't turn into one of those people who change under pressure. You know what I mean, don't you? Those kinda people that change because they're famous.

"Don't lose your head in the clouds. Keep your feet on the ground. Don't brag. Remember where you came from, and remember those who always stood by you. God gave you what you wanted. Always remember that He can take it back."

Good luck Haziq, you know I love you (:

shagged.

2010-12-01T03:51:00.000+08:00

These past few days have been really hectic, waking up early in the morning, and going home so late at night. But it was all fun, and not to mention it was a great experience. Hanging out with Kak Faith, Eleena, Haziq and Nini was a real eye-opener for me. Back and forth trips to MIG made me realize that showbiz wasn't all about fame and fortune, but there's also so much hard work put into it. What we see isn't really what we get, there's so many things to take care of. I always thought the boom mic did all the audio for movies, but no, there was dubbing involved, and what not.

Not to mention that I also made new friends, like Azlina, and I managed to meet some local artists like Farid Kamil, Shahiezy Sam and also Diana Amir (who was Azlina's sister). All and all, the past week was just... amazing. We met countless times to do rehearsals for casting, but now that casting is over, I don't know what's next. And I sure hope that won't be the last time I'll be hanging out with them.

We did so many things, went to so many places, but unfortunately, there aren't many photos taken. However, I'm sure some photos would be enough to get you by.

Btw, casting was alright, tried my best, but still a little stiff here and there. I could have done better, that's the thing, but whoever gets it... rezeki masing-masing lah ye :D I won't be all that upset anyway, because I know I tried. But if I get it, alhamdulillah (:

Oh, and before I forget, Shira and Lia visited Malaysia again, and I got to meet them for the 2nd time. Went to the Curve with them, and also Nini, where we met Anis for the first time too. And we bumped into... Azim, at F.O.S there too. Wow, this week has been pretty amazing, seeing that I met so many people.

the aftermath is secondary.

2010-11-21T12:48:00.001+08:00

It's been so long since I've heard any latest news about My Chemical Romance. Partly my fault too because I've been too preoccupied with other things, and other artistes *coughadamlambertcough* but finally I've caught up (a little). Oh god, how I have missed them so much. The sound of Gerard's voice bursting through these speakers brings back so much memories. I have always talked about how I think Adam sounds like an angel, whereas now Gerard sounds like a fallen, angsty angel. Yes, still an angel. I am a freak.

So from goth-looking, gun-wielding vampires to a marching band of the living dead, My Chemical Romance is now... what? I'm not sure myself. More like... lasergun-wielding daredevils. They're so colourful now! Not like I'm complaining. Although I do admit that I so much preferred their "Bullets" and "Revenge" sound best, bands change, and as a fan, I accept them whichever way they are. Their lyrics are still as complexed and profound as ever, and I think their music now is more like a mashup of all their previous albums. As long as Gee's voice has not changed, I'm happy :')

Meet the Fabulous Killjoys!

Left to right: Gerard Way as Poison Party, Ray Toro as Jet Star,

Frank Iero as Fun Ghoul, Mikey Way as Kobra Kid

And nope! You are not mistaken! Gerard no longer has black hair. Neither does he have bleached hair. Now he has RED hair. Can't believe it? Can't see clearly? Here are better pictures to prove it to you.

He is still well beautiful, isn't he? Just before he had red hair, he has yellow hair. Yes, yellow. Not blonde. And yeah, there is a difference okay :P

If you aren't a big MCR fan, you might not have noticed, but... Bob Bryar is no longer in the band :'( Yes, I am pretty upset by this news, because he was an amazing drummer, and he just completed MCR.

In a statement posted on MCR's official site, guitarist Frank Iero wrote that "as a band, we have been very fortunate over the years that our sweet times have greatly outweighed the sour ones, and a great deal of that is owed to you, the fans. Which is why we wanted this news to come from us and not some bullsh-- gossip site.

"As of 4 weeks ago, My Chemical Romance and Bob Bryar parted ways," the statement continued. "This was a painful decision for all of us to make and was not taken lightly. We wish him the best of luck in his future endeavors and expect you all to do the same."

No reason was given for the split, though according to Notifi Radio and others, Bryar left after "an argument of some sort ensued between [him] and the rest of the band."

Bryar joined My Chem in 2004, replacing original drummer Matt Pelissier, and played on their ambitious The Black Parade album. There's no word on just who will replace him behind the kit, though it sounds like the band are already moving on: Iero ended the statement by mentioning that the remaining members of MCR were already back at work on their new album.

2004 until 2010 is not a short time, and I'm sure that whatever argument it was, 6 years worth of hardcore bonding and teamwork was enough to resolve it. But since things weren't meant to be, then I guess I just have to get used to the band being a four-man army.

So just as a memento, here's a video of Bob playing the drums to Welcome To The Black Parade, one of the songs on the last album he did together with My Chemical Romance. Peace.

I was watching some really old videos of My Chemical Romance, and also some of their Making Of's, and oh god, I swear I miss them so much. And one of the main reasons why my love for MCR suddenly got rekindled is kindly because of Suraya Thornton, one of my best friends from school. She went for a drum competition yesterday, in which she got 3rd place. She played a drum cover of Helena. By none other than my beloved MCR. She definitely did the band justice, and I am so proud of her! Never mind being 3rd, she's still one of the most talented girls I have ever met!

To wrap everything up, I just can't wait for MCR's new album,

Danger Days

The True Lives Of The Fabulous Killjoys

graham norton.

2010-11-20T03:11:00.003+08:00

I'm just updating to tell you about a wonderful show I have just recently discovered and got hooked on. There was once a time where I was so obsessed with Whose Line Is It Anyway and I could never sleep unless I watched at least 5 different episodes each night. WLIIA is a really amazing show, really funny too. But when that stopped, I finally found something equally as funny. Or perhaps maybe even more.
The Graham Norton Show! ♥

The cast of Whose Line Is It Anyway

The Graham Norton Show is basically a talk show, something like Oprah and also Ellen Degeneres, but there is just something about Graham that I really like. He's so comical, and witty, and his spontaneous jokes are always amazing. He has all these guest stars on his show that are just as funny, and... I don't know, it's just fun to watch. It's at moments like these where I wished that Astro had BBC, so that I could watch it weekly.

Oh, and not to mention that I dug up an old YouTube star that I have long forgotten, and grew to love. He's well funny, and I LOVE his videos so much. I think some of you may know him. He's really famous for his... umm, "chinese-ness". I didn't mean to sound racist there, but really!

Meet Peter Chao! Here is a link to his YouTube. Be sure to watch it, I guarantee you that you WILL NOT regret it!

I have also noticed that I have been blogging less about my life. That's mainly because nothing new and interesting are happening, except for the fact that school has closed, and the holidays are officially here, even though I already took my own holiday like 2 weeks before the official closing date. But who cares anyway, EOYs are over, and there's no point going to school anyway.

This will be so boring. As boring as normal school days, especially if I don't find anything to do. I'd really love to find a job, but I think it's too late. All thanks to my parents who keep telling me that I cannot work, and suddenly told me today that as long as I have a student pass, I can work here. Oh shucks, if that was the case, I would have started working ever since I started taking my own holiday!

Dolly, Yaya, Hariz, Zul and Ayeen have started working at Secret Recipe, while Haziq is working at Ayer's Rock which is just nearby. Argh, am I jealous or what? These people are gonna get money at the end of the month, and they're probably gonna have a blast, while I am here, broke with no job. (wow, I sound like I have a pathetic life) But I am seriously going to get myself a job. I really hope I can.

Currently watching the latest episode of Glee: The Substitute. Toodles~!

air supply live in malaysia

2010-11-20T02:50:00.000+08:00

So a few days ago (5 days to be exact, on the 15th of Nov), I went to see Air Supply Live In Malaysia. It was their Love Never Ends Tour, and thank you soooo much to Akid Rosli for the VIP tickets :') I had a great time that night, and Air Supply is indeed a world-class act. The concert was AWESOME. And finally, after so many years of growing up to their songs, I managed to listen to them sing live. Songs like Making Love Out Of Nothing At All, Power Of Love, All Out Of Love, The One That You Love and some other songs. Notice how all the songs I listed out has the word "love" in them? I find it so cool :P

I'd say a lot about this night, but I can't seem to find the right words for it, so let the pictures do the talking. There were more photos of Air Supply performing rather than photos of me and Akid, so do bear with me here.

2 in a row.

2010-11-04T01:58:00.002+08:00

Now I know we said things, did things that we didn't mean. And we fall back into the same patterns, same routine. But your temper's just as bad as mine is, you're the same as me. When it comes to love, you're just as blinded. Baby, please come back. It wasn't you. Baby, it was me. Maybe our relationship isn't as crazy as it seems. Maybe thats what happens when a tornado meets a volcano. All I know is I love you too much to walk away though.

Sunway Pyramid with my darlings was great ♥

And I may not have made a blog post for this, but now I shall. 3 days ago, one of the best girls in the world turned 16. Her name? Nurul Aryni Bte Jamaluddin ♥ She's my best friend, my walking diary, my soul sister, and everything I've looked for in a friend. Thank you for always being there (':

After Sunway, Nini and I hung out with Lutfi. Although there were only the 3 of us, it was fun, aimlessly driving around and looking for a haunted house that Nini was deathly afraid of. Met Ema and Ridhwan at TUDM and had Tom Yam for dinner. Ahhh, I can say that Tuesday was well-spent with beloved friends (:

For photos, click here.

Sorry there aren't any photos of Lutfi, Ema and Ridhwan in here. My camera died while we were still in Sunway. Bummer.

Oh, and yes, who could forget, happy birthday to one of the best guy friends I could possibly ask for! Zul Aziz! :') You've turned 16 too, darling. Have a blast!

glamnation tour in malaysia!

2010-10-17T18:22:00.005+08:00

Today is the 17th of October. It's been 3 days. I am still suffering from post-GNT (Glamnation Tour) depression. Which includes my inner voices continuously asking me "Why did it end so fast?", "Was that really him?" and "Will he ever come back?". And not saying that this phase will end anytime soon, I think it'll go on for weeks to come. Why? Because Adam's Glamnation Tour was undeniably the best concert I have ever been to. How awesome? So awesome that it was the first time I ever danced in my life! And if you knew me personally, you would know that I do not dance, and neither do I like it much either. But Adam's aura just slowly seeped into me and I lost all control in there. It was like I was under a trance.

And who could forget all the amazing Glamberts I saw on that day? A lot of people dressing like mini-Adams, and Adam clones. Too much glam and glitter, Adam Lambert fans are just amazing! Oh, and to those who think that I was trying to dress up all Adam Lambert, to be honest, only my eyemakeup was based off him. What I wore to GNT is actually my usual get-up, and also what I wear when I go out with friends. The most memorable Glambert I met was Linness Yusof, dressed up as a Geisha. While everyone else was getting all Glambert-ish, in the middle of the crowd was a geisha. Who wouldn't find that cool?

Me, Nini and Akid arrived at around 5.15pm (seeing that my dad had no idea where the Putra Indoor Stadium was and got lost on the way), and even then, there were already hundreds of people lining up. I took part in the Glam-It-Up contest to meet Adam Lambert backstage. Sadly, I didn't win, but it's perfectly alright with me! :D

Around 6.45 pm, the lines have already started moving to go into the stadium. It's at that exact moment where we all felt nervous (for God knows what reason) and also really excited. Waiting for Adam to come on stage took a long time, but luckily the organizers knew how to keep us entertained, whatnot with playing great songs for the crowd to sing with, and also throwing DiGi balls everywhere. That was fun :P

At around 8+ pm, the opening acts started performing. First up was Iqwal with a cover of Down by Jay Sean. Next was Daniel Lee with It's My Life, originally by Bon Jovi. Unfortunately, I couldn't find Daniel Lee's video, but I do have Iqwal's. Thanks to the man himself for posting it onto my profile (:

After the opening acts, there was another intermission where we had to wait a little longer for Adam. By then I was already tired and dizzy, but it was all for Adam, so I'm willing to wait. There were changes in the screen before us, all containing really stunning photos of Adam. Here are are the photos, and sorry for the bad quality!

And after waiting, the most awaited moment, ADAM LAMBERT FINALLY CAME ON STAGE! He started off with the mysterious performance of a medley of Voodoo, For Your Entertainment, Down the Rabbit Hole and also Ring Of Fire. Let's just say that his whole performance was amazing. I would put up videos of him performing at the concert, but I don't have any except for Whataya Want From Me and also Aftermath. And even the quality to those aren't that nice ;p

Oh heck, here it is anyway.

But there's just one thing I'd like to stress, and that is how much fun I had that night. Dancing to every upbeat song he sung, all the lights, theatrics, choreography, costume and so much more. The emotions flowing out of Adam was just so spectacular, and you can feel it so strongly. I'm starting to talk crap, but that's what happens when I experience something that I don't know how to explain.

If I had to compare to the night I went for Tokio Hotel, there are so many differences! I loooove Tokio Hotel, but that was the worst night of my life. Horrible opening acts, boring as hell. Waiting in the rain, the DJ was taking too long, a TOO rowdy crowd, and Tokio Hotel's performance was too short. Argh, there were so many wrong things with Tokio Hotel.

But Adam? No, nothing. It was perfect. I didn't get the meet and greet but it didn't bother me at all! Sure at some points, I would suffer from a stomachache because I hadn't had anything to eat before the concert, but whenever Adam came on stage to perform, the pain left! There are simply no words to describe Adam's concert.

SUPERB, EXCELLENT, AMAZING
would be understatements, really.

After the concert, Nini spotted Iqwal, and we decided to take a photo with him. After that the rest of the stadium followed along. Which means yes, we were the FIRST 3 people from the crowd that night that took a photo with him, and I don't know why I feel so proud at that fact.

When we went back home, visited KFC for a while, bought food home, and rested for school the next day. 14 October, it was an amazing day, really it was. I still can't believed it happened, because dude, it's ADAM FREAKING LAMBERT! And I sure hope that this won't be his first and last time in Malaysia just because of those PAS freaks. Adam is a spectacular act, no doubt.

Adam's setlist included:

Voodoo
For Your Entertainment
Down The Rabbit Hole
Ring Of Fire
Fever
Sleepwalker
Whataya Want From Me
Soaked
Broken Open
Aftermath
Sure Fire Winners
Strut
Music Again
If I Had You

Encore:

Mad World
20th Century Boy

Oh, and let me say once more that Adam Lambert,
indeed has a flawless voice ♥

For more photos, please visit my Facebook album (:
ADAM LAMBERT LIVE IN MALAYSIA! ♥

Oh and for those wondering, yes a protest did happen outside the stadium. But no one cared, and they were really insignificant. So whatever ;p

in yo face!

2010-10-09T15:39:00.002+08:00

Ah, my heart feels so much lighter now :')

Glambert’s concert to go on despite protests

KUALA LUMPUR: The show will go on for Adam Lambert despite protests from PAS. The flamboyant pop star assured his fans via his record label Sony Music Malaysia that he would be here.

Glambert, as he is also known, will be arriving on Oct 13. He is scheduled to go on stage at the Putra Indoor Stadium in Bukit Jalil on Oct 14.

An official from the Arts, Culture and Heritage Ministry said the singer had signed a contract, agreeing to abide by the rules.

“Adam has promised us in writing not to pull any stunts during his Malaysian concert,” the official said.

The American Idol Season Eight runner-up, who is openly gay, has made headlines due to his sexual orientation. During his recent concerts in Japan and Singapore, Glambert created media frenzy by kissing his bassist on stage.

And by the way, who wants to join me?

Glambert fans, listen up! If you want to welcome Adam Lambert as he touches down in Malaysia, you can catch him at KLIA on Wednesday, 13th October 2010 when he arrives at 6:25pm on flight # MH73 from Hong Kong! Show him your love!

five more days.

2010-10-09T03:16:00.004+08:00

Counting the days. I CAN'T WAIT. So I am going to spam this post with a truckload of Adam photos. Okay maybe not so much ;p But before I get to that, I need some help. If you people happen to read my blog please help me report this site?

Protest Against Adam Lambert's Concert on 14th October at Putra Indoor Stadium, Bukit Jalil

We wouldn't want Beyonce's incident to happen again, a concert getting cancelled exactly 2 days before it happened. It would piss people off so much. If you knew he was gay and a "bad influence", why even bring him in the first place? Would've spared us fans from the pain. I just hope the protest isn't successful, and the concert can go on.

By the way, I got shot down a lot by people in that group for my own point of view. It's a really long story, and I don't want to repeat it again and again. Just know that I did not fling any insults towards anybody, but apparently everybody there is telling me what's right to do in my religion, and everyone's judging me. Islamic of you indeed aye? Allah didn't teach us to hate and pray for the death of other Islam people. And all this happened only because I wanted to watch Adam perform.

Ahhh, I know. They wanna ask me whether my sembahyang sempurna and stuff, talking as though THEIR sembahyang sempurna. They wanna talk about me tak tutop aurat because I don't wear tudung, but some of these tudung girls work as pelacur and some don't even have their virginity, and I'm glad I still have my dignity even though I don't wear a tudung.

Someone even mentioned that even though they're not a virgin or something, they still menjalankan tugas Allah by using a tudung. WATAFAK? Kalau nak pakai tudung and have sex, lebeh baek takyah memalukan agama Islam, just take off the tudung.

Asking me why I joined the group if I have my own opinions of Adam, because that group was made specifically for people who hate Adam. The reason why I joined is because one of us fans needed to speak up. I know they have their own opinions, but they should just keep it to themselves. Kalau tak suke Adam tu, diam2 je la. You don't even have to attend his concert. Takde orang pakse. What about those people who wanna watch him perform?

But this? Nooooo. They bersuara and wanna membantah against Adam Lambert because he's gay, his performances are lucah, and his actions will encourage maksiat and the gay community. Then they start talking about alcohol, maksiat, pembuangan bayi and whatnots. Seriously, what the fuck? Adam datang baru nak kecoh pasal bende ni sume? Before this, how come no one really bothered about these cases? No one bothered about the gays in KL, and thousands of babies killed and thrown away each year, and unprotected sex amongst teenagers.

Nak ckp psl kalau Adam datang, akidah rosak kat Malaysia, but I think akidah kat Malaysia dah memang cukop rosak pon. If you know being gay is so wrong, then don't be stupid enough to follow after him. Adam isn't forcing anyone to be gay like him. I'm a huge fan, but I'm straight. I idolise him for his voice.

They made it sound like if they cancelled Adam's concert, more people will go to Maher Zain. This will not happen, because you can't just change people's taste in music just like that. I have absolutely no problem with Maher Zain, but you all know how big of a fan I am of Adam.

And they were talking about how if I went to Maher Zain's instead, I get pahala. What pahala? It's still a goddamn concert! Pahala wak lu la sial.

They said if I went to Adam Lambert's, I'll be doing a sin because I will bersentuhan ngan lelaki. Seriously now, how come before this, this issue was never brought up? What about World Stage, and all the other concerts Malaysia ever held? Katy Perry is all scantily-clad, and there wasn't any protest against her at all? Hayley Williams had a photo showing her titties online, but there's nothing against that too! How come they never mentioned that these people could be a bad influence? (I mean, no offence, I like Katy Perry and Paramore, but admit it, what I said made sense)

Yes, being gay and kissing his bassist is wrong, but instead of cancelling the whole concert, they should just give Adam some rules to abide by. Imagine if Adam found out about this whole protest thing? He'd probably be upset. No one said gays had no feelings.

Kita umat Islam spatotnye jage hati orang laen, tapi ni tak. Ni nak kutok, talk as though they're so perfect themselves. Siap mendoakan kene azab kat Adam Lambert's concert lagi. Kene panggil jahil only because I like Adam. Abeh those people yang buang bayi tak jahil? There's a nicer way to solve this, instead of protesting like idiots.

Talking about how I sokong bende yang mungkar, when all I want is to hear Adam sing live. Talking about what good do I get if I go to his concert. And sebelom ni, pergi World Stage sume memang ade manfaat ke?

So I came to the conclusion that the main reason why they do not want to bring Adam into the country is because... HE'S GAY.

Do not criticise people from outside your country, when the people IN your country are actually worse off than him.

And on to the better things, here's the leather-clad crooner I can't wait to see, ♥

Not forgetting that on the 14th of October, I will also be celebrating my two year anniversary with my bestest friend ever, Aryni Jamaluddin (:

5 MORE DAYS TO GO!

let's just fall in love again.

2010-10-06T00:58:00.006+08:00

Past few days have been pretty fun, with open houses here and there. So according to chronological order, there was:

2 Open houses at TTDI
Nazeem's Open House
Dolly's Open House
Ayan's Open House
"Study Group" at KFC
Imran's Birthday and Open House
"Study Group" at 7 Days

Getting together with friends is definitely a blast and it's something I really enjoy doing. There's just something about getting together and sharing a laugh that gives me the warm fuzzies inside :B One thing I CANNOT forget to mention is that, during Nazeem's open house, Zawawi (?) brought his pet wolf along. Yeap, you got it. WOLF. Not a dog, but a wolf. But it was a wolf pup, so it was small. And so... so... sweet (':

Photos are all on Facebook, but I'm gonna put some up here for the heck of it.

TTDI

Nazeem's

Dolly's

Ayan's

"Study Group" // KFC

Imran's

Aaaand there's no photos of us "studying" at 7 Days. Well, there are some, but they're all not important anyway. And I think you know why when I say study, I put them in quotations. Come on, you're/once were a student. You know the naughty things we do as children ;p We say we study but in fact, we sit down and waste time. God, I need to stop doing that.
EXAMS, SHAFIQAH. EXAMS!

Oh, and by the way, I'm glad things are back to the way it used to be.

You have no idea how much I worried that I'd lose you, how much I felt you slipping away, how upset I was, how much I thought about where we stood then, how much I thought about what was left for us, and last but not least, how much I missed you.

I'm sorry for everything. You know I love you, ♥

you could save my life.

2010-09-26T16:02:00.000+08:00

I can safely say you've been on my mind since forever.
You make me feel better when my mind has its rainy days.

14 OCTOBER 2010 ♥

why do we like to hurt so much?

2010-09-25T19:20:00.002+08:00

I heard this song on the radio the last time I went to Singapore, and I'm glad I remembered it. This song made me tear, and it's been quite some time since a song hit me so hard like this. The last song to give me the goosebumps was Taylor Swift's "Mine". Wonderful song, amazing video.

A little boy, six years old

A little too used to being alone

Another new mom and dad

Another school, another house that will never be home

When people ask him how he likes this place

He looks up and says with a smile upon his face

This is my temporary home, it's not where I belong

Windows and rooms that I'm passing through

This is just a stop on the way to where I'm going

I'm not afraid because I know

This is my temporary home

Young mom, on her own

She needs a little help, got nowhere to go

She's looking for a job, looking for a way out

'Cause a halfway house will never be a home

At night she whispers to her baby girl

"Someday we'll find our place here in this world"

This is our temporary home, it's not where we belong

Windows and rooms that we're passing through

This is just a stop on the way to where we're going

I'm not afraid because I know

This is our temporary home

Old man, hospital bed

The room is filled with people he loves

And he whispers

"Don't cry for me, I'll see you all someday"

He looks up and says

"I can see God's face"

This is my temporary home, it's not where I belong

Windows and rooms that I'm passing through

This was just a stop on the way to where I'm going

I'm not afraid because I know

This was my temporary home

This is our temporary home

This song reminds me that everyone around us hurts. We can be standing next to a stranger that's completely broken, shattered, and we'd never know it. This world is so cruel sometimes, and too harsh on a human's soul. But life still goes on, and I am really sure that somehow, all of you will be able to make it through whatever is hurting you right now (:

umaira's.

2010-09-22T17:30:00.002+08:00

it don't shine here every day.

2010-09-21T22:39:00.001+08:00

So these past few days have been pretty fun, and not forgetting that school has started. Such a bore, zzz. And yes! I have changed my blogskin (: The old skin holds lots of memories, but I have decided to make a change. And let me tell you, it was NOT easy trying to edit this.

Some stuff that happened past few days?

Reha and Adib's open house
Went to Syimir's
Pavilion with Yaya, Dolly, Haziq, Elora and Sarah Sha
Yaya's open house
Umaira's open house

Photos from Umaira's open house not up yet, but I can't wait to see them (:

And btw, GUESS WHAT ARRIVED IN THE MAIL TODAY?

AAAAAAHHHHH! I am SO excited, and so super friggin' stoked for this!
October 14, yes yes yes ♥

Will be seeing you, gorgeous (:

glam, drama, excitement.

2010-09-13T21:54:00.008+08:00

Raya was good :) Not the best, just good. I still preferred 2009's raya though. There was Atiqah (Syed Taha), and my family stayed in Singapore for around 5 days, so we went to almost every relative's house. Yeah, that was a good time. But that doesn't mean I didn't enjoy 2010's. I still did. Just wished it would have been more "happening".

This year however, there are quite a lot of photos! Check them out on Facebook (:

Hari Raya 2010

Hari Raya 2010, II

Raya reminds me, that I haven't seen the best friend in a week. God, I miss you, and we really need to meet up soon. Missing you so much, beh :'( ♥

And for those who followed my Facebook, remember my constant whining about this?

Yes, Adam Lambert's GLAMNATION TOUR 2010 Live In Malaysia! I am so psyched for this concert, because today, a certain girl just got the best birthday present ever from the best dad in the whole world. THE PITT STANDING TICKETS! My dad ordered a ticket online for me, for my birthday. Now I feel so much better knowing that I am CERTAINLY going for Adam's tour :'D
I love you, dad ♥

For those who are wondering about the seating arrangements, here it is:

Yes, my tickets are for the red section :> Only God knows how happy I am.
I mean come on, it's Adam FREAKING Lambert!

I will be seeing you in 4 weeks, love ♥

Oh by the way, have I ever mentioned how much I adore this boy?

I ♥ this little monster.

fasting month is over!

2010-09-09T20:10:00.002+08:00

Today is the last day of Ramadhan, so without further adieu, I'd like to wish everyone:

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri,

Maaf Zahir dan Batin ♥

Today is 9th September.

Another 4 days would mark one whole year, one heartbreak fixed, another name forgotten, another face erased and a whole lot of memories thrown away. Should I be sad that it ended? No, in fact, I am happy it happened, because now I am aware of the really complexed and delicate masks people put on. I will be aware from now on.

But is that all really important now!? HELL NAW! It's Raya baybehs, and it's time to get together with family members you never knew existed, with friends who stuck by your through it all, and the one thing that most of us kids are looking forward to... The continuous flow of moolah, diving straight into your hands. $$$ ka-ching, ka-ching!

But who can forget one of the main purposes of Raya? And that is to seek forgiveness from all those you wronged, and to forgive those who wronged you. Some people might still be hard-headed and still DO NOT want to forgive others *coughcough*, but please, do not show hate on this marvelous occasion. The thing about me is, I'd still forgive you all, even if you once took my heart, ripped it to pieces and threw the remains into a fire, and then scattered the ashes into the ocean. I'll still forgive all of you :')

A few days ago, I was talking about how I had no mood to celebrate this festive season, but tonight, I'm already feeling the groove.

BRING IT ON, HARI RAYA!

a digit higher.

2010-09-01T00:18:00.004+08:00

Everyone knows that no words can describe how much I love these 2 boys, especially their band. I think I have stressed that so many times, that it should be clear by now that their music is food for my soul. It's been one hell of a year. And today, I'd like to thank God for their existance in this world. May their journey in life be blissful, and happy. Always.

Happy 21st birthday,

Bill & Tom Kaulitz ♥

unlike any other.

2010-08-22T14:26:00.002+08:00

So it's been some time since I made blog posts like these, so let me do it while I still got the drive. Everyone knows who is Aryni Jamaluddin right? Whoever reads my blog or follow my Facebook and still doesn't know who this fine young lady is, then SHAME ON YOU! The whole world should know by now that Nini is my bestest friend, my soul sister, my other half and my walking, living, breathing diary.

We've been through things, but still throughout it all, stood strong, or better yet, we stood STRONGER. She never fails to make me smile, and I never want to see her frown. Whoever hurts her, has to go through me ;) Although we've been friends for only around 2 years now, it feels like I've known her forever. She's probably she only person who I can be myself with, without feeling ashamed. She knows every little dark secret about me, that no one else knows. I know sometimes I make her mad, and sometimes she makes me mad too, but no doubt, we won't let this strong friendship go to waste just like that.

There's so much I can say about her! She's loud, she's happy, she just glows an aura of positivity. However beneath that fresh exterior, is a girl with low self-confidence, someone who always doubts herself. I don't know how many times I need to explain to her that she's amazing just the way she is, and there is absolutely nothing for her to worry about, because she's different and I like that, ♥

This young man right here is Haziq Akashah. I don't know why it took me so long to realize that he could be company that I really enjoy. How long has it been since there was boy who knows how to unbreak my heart? He doesn't need to send me mushy text messages, he doesn't need to write long poems, he doesn't need to hold my hand all the time, he doesn't need to prioritize me all the time. All he needs to do is be himself, as that was the reason why I fell hard. He reminds me so much of my best friend sometimes, and that made me think, that maybe this is much better than I thought it actually is.

The thing about Haziq is, he's lame, sometimes he's stupid, and he definitely needs to unclog his ears because there are moments where he doesn't even listen to half the things I say. He's impatient at moments, and he's stubborn. But he's also really nice, he has one of the softest voices I've ever heard from a boy, and he has a captivating smile. There are so many flaws on him that I can list out, but when I sit down and think about it, it's those exact same flaws that makes him the adorable boy I know, and it's also those same reasons why he is the one I fell for out of hundreds. He is simply, amazing ♥

And the both of them put together would equal to God's greatest gift to me. Angels heaven-sent to make me feel better through every pain thrown at my face.The two people always there to ensure me that I'm never in this alone.

And to those who have a problem with this bond we share:

GET USED TO IT!

Thank you for completing my life :')